I'm at my wits end

[system]

My mum 'asked Jesus into her life' when I was about 12.

Since then she hasn't bothered with me.

That I can handle but what I'm struggling with is she sees my youngest on a regular basis. He now thinks I'm going to hell...

Do I stop her seeing him?

[RATTER15]

You need to talk to your Mum and explain the situation to her, if she cant accept what she is doing then yes stop her visiting him.

[pa___ul3]

how old is he? I think you should explain to him why you disagree with her, encourage him to look further into and make his own mind up. Anything you say to pit him against her she may twist as the work of the devil or whatever they spout, but if you just urge him to think for himself then he'll come to his own conclusions.

[woofgang]

maybe...it depends on your son and whether he can set aside what he is being told or whether it is scaring or upsetting him. If he was my sone I would definitely give his visits to his nan a break then decide with him what you want to do.

[system]

He's 12

he attends a religious school.

RS is subject they have everyday

He goes to a Catholic school.....she is a 'born again'

[RATTER15]

Oh dear!!!!!!

[beso]

You are sending your child to a religious school. Consequently it is somewhat hypocritical for you to blame your mother for what is disturbing him.

[woofgang]

are you happy with the school and what they are teaching?

[seadogg]

With any luck he'll grow out of it and you can't argue with religious nutters anyway. You might do well to restrict his visits to her as he is likely to fall into the hands of the bonkers brigade.

Above all he should appreciate that a christian approach to life is not the same as what these people are up to, especially the bit about,
"JUdge not, that you be not judged"

[RATTER15]

Read the Bible yourself you will find that what your Mother is saying is probably backed up by the Bible and the school you choose to send your child to.

[redcrx]

why have you sent your son to a religious school?

[lady-janine]

beso have to say think that is rather bigoted of you. i went to a religious school and had and still have friends who went to different ones. we learnt about each others religion through frequent discussion and think it has made us all more tolerant. most of us are still in touch with one another and are all still following our various religious beliefs.
would be very worried if this was my son as he not being taught tolerance and understanding by his grandmother.
system - have you discussed the matter with
1. your son;
2. your partner (if you have one);
3. your mother;
4. your sons school?
hope i am not treading on any toes or offending you in any way but feel you need to got this sorted out sooner rather than later.

[woofgang]

I too went to a very religious school and was never taught that all non believers went to Hell which is why I asked if the OP was happy with what the school was teaching. It is very factually wrong and pretty prejudiced not to mention silly to say that all religions are the same and teach the same things.

[system]

I'm a Catholic. He goes to a Catholic school.

He goes to that school, as does his brothers and sisters

I do not have a problem with religious teaching....I have a problem with the 'born again's' saying I will 'go to hell' because I haven't accepted Jesus into my life

I have a 12 year old, scared, that his mother will burn in hell.

[beso]

Some institutions ignore what they don't like in the book they claim is the word of their deity but as pointed out by ratter, the Bible actually backs your grandmother's position.

If you are comfortable with your son's school teaching from that same book then you had better work at some kind of reconciliation of the conflicting interpretations. Fact is both your mother and the teachers are both piling rubbish into your son's mind.

[woofgang]

Then you have an opening to talk to him about the difference between what the school teaches and what his nan believes, why there might be differences and so on. It sounds to me. That your son might be too worried to carry on seeing his nan ATM so I would deffo suspend the visits and tell your mum clearly why (although it sounds more like she's got a mental health problem than religion and may not be able to take in your view) what you say to your son depends a bit on how you feel. You could point out to him that your mum may not be well and that what she believes and tells him is definitely a minority view. It's quite hard to challenge a belief on the basis of another belief, and I say this as one who is not a member of a church but who definitely believes in god.

[beso]

Religion IS a mental health problem.

[woofgang]

Oh besotted give it a rest!

[woofgang]

Ha, besotted....guesses what I put in the swear filter to get that?

[jackthehat]

It might be an idea if some ABers could recognise that their own prejudices regarding religion, aren't of much use to the OP.......

I would advise that unless she can keep her opinions to herself (I trust you've tackled her about her inappropriate comments ?) you place sufficient distance between your son and your mother.

Do you have a sympathetic family priest who could act on your behalf to ask your mum to temper her comments ? She might take more notice of him and lay off your son.