my partner has chosen his faith over me

[baggysenior]

hi there,
My partner (43yrs old) has been acting very oddly in the past month. When i finally found the confidence to confront him he told me he was deeply troubled. So i asked him to elaborate. He said that something was going on in the world and he had to try and do something about it. 6 years ago he left the Jehovah faith and told me those days were behind him, but i noticed he'd been looking up the Watch Tower website on my computer so i knew something was up. He became very distant with me and told me he couldn't be intimate with me as he had too much on his mind. Well, this blew me away and has chipped away at my self confidence since, all the usual thoughts..... is it because i've put weight on bla bla. He's had a face like thunder every day. Last night he said he couldn't make me happy. I knew he was ending it with me, so i let him go. He apologised, and said he was being pulled back into a faith. I was nice, i never argued or begged him to stay. Before he left i asked him for a hug, and he whispered if ever i get scared, to go to the Kingdom Hall. Well, there was no response. I have a faith, but i choose to keep it to myself, and never preach about my beliefs. I wouldn't let my religion come between me and a loved one. He told me two weeks ago he loved me. I know there is no other reason ie another woman, but i'm struggling to understand why he left, and what is he talking about when he says there's something going on in the world (i'm not stupid, i know there's a load of crap going on) but am i trying to understand something i never will? it feels strange to be dumped for a religion, i wonder how to pick myself up and move on. Any input would be gratefully received. Thanks.

[Ankou]

i have a feeling i've seen this post before.

[naomi24]

Is this the same man - the sociopath - who you didn't want worming his way back into your life last January?

http://www.theanswerb...g/Question979773.html

And in several other questions you say someone dumped you. Is that him too?

[naomi24]

Seems that way.

[Ankou]

probably the cannabis. or the 2 daughters. or the fact that she was seeing another man for 6 months while seeing this one for 6 years.

life's complicated.

[naomi24]

Look familiar?

http://www.theanswerb...y/Question821347.html

[cathfromsaron]

thanks ABers!

yes, pick yourself up and move on, in all respects!

[naomi24]

^^ Good advice.

[sandyRoe]

A life of faith can sometimes call for great sacrifices. Be thankful that your partner has found the path that will bring him fulfillment.

[redcrx]

"i wonder how to pick myself up and move on"

can you read over the last few years worth of posts and get the gist of advice already given maybe?

[Ankou]

crikey naomi, october 2009.

its such a shame i occupy valuable (and ever decreasing) memory space for unedifying dross.

[baggysenior]

perhaps pick myself up and move on wasn't the right words. I'm ok and have other things in my life now, i was more curious as to the 'something big is going on' that's all. I wasn't asking for criticism. Thanks anyway.

[redcrx]

well dont go back this time eh?

there probably isnt anything big going on, more than likely its a result of years of canabis abuse and its all in his head.

[Old_Geezer]

If the strength in your religious beliefs are strong enough you may well feel that choosing to get right that which is paramount in existence itself, transcends the loves and desires of someone in this earthly life. From what you said I'd say it was not reasonable to go looking for the answer in anything you have or have not done, or are or are not. You would just be giving yourself additional grief for no reason, for no benefit. He's told you why he wishes to leave, you need to accept that rather than look for an answer you'd prefer.

As for him thinking something is going on, well who knows what the cults believe except those involved. Probably belief in another Rapture or something most like. Haven't had one of those for a few days now.

You consider your life's relationships paramount, and that is good. He has presently decided his belief is paramount. It is best you mourn over the loss of the relationship for a bit, and then pick your life up again. Besides why would someone want a partner who didn't put them as priority, save perhaps fear of being alone for a while. Let him go, it's his decision, his loss. You will survive stronger and eventually look back with relief.

[baggysenior]

Ankou, i don't get the 'seeing another man for 6 months whilst seeing him' thats completely incorrect. I have never said or done that. Please get your facts straight.

[lcg]

my god, love. i'd just give up if i were you...

[baggysenior]

giving up now lcg76 :-) Thankyou Old-Geezer

[naomi24]

//i was more curious as to the 'something big is going on' that's all.//

I can only imagine your boyfriend believes the Jehovah's Witnesses when they say that Armageddon is almost upon us. I shouldn't worry about it though. They've been saying it for years - and have even given expected dates - but those dates have come and gone and we're all still here. :o)

[baggysenior]

thanks naomi24. I had a feeling it was that but didn't wan't to say until i'd heard it from someone else. yaye we're still here :)

[vew573]

Baggysenior, As one of Jehovah's Witnesses he could not live with someone and not be married to them. Why not visit a kingdom hall and check for yourself what the Witnesses are all about. Ask for a Bible study. It won't cost you anything (their free) and you will be in a position to ask questions. It may be that you will like what your learning, or you may come to the conclusion that it is best that you two not be together. Which ever, you have nothing to lose.