Beliefs

[bensmum]

Following on from my post about atheists and praying chakka asked what I meant when I said I didn't believe in god but nor was I an atheist. I don't believe in god - I suppose I could be called agnostic about god as I accept that there is a possibility that such an entity exists. Most atheists I know believe in the here and now and don't accept the possibilty of a god.
She also asked what I teach Ben. He is 24 years old so I teach him nothing but my children have been brought up to question and challenge - they have made up their own minds up. (and yes they were christened - I'm ashamed to say through pressure from relatives)
My question would be - would an atheist accept that their child may have religious leanings and similarly would the religious among you accept that your child may be atheist? How would you discuss it with them?

[evedawn]

I would find it very, very painful if any of my family didn't believe in God but... there is NO point in pushing religion down anyones throat. Better to lead by example cos if you force the issue it make folk run a mile in the opposit direction.

[taliesin238]

If my child turned arround and told me that they had joined a certain religion then i would support them all the way!! Ive always studied religion and went to church with my next door neighbour and my mum was worried telling me that they were brain washing me (they were evangelists). I did not feel in anyway that they were brain washing me and i beleive that my mum didnt realise that i was old enough to think independantly (I was 12-15) !! As i got older and more read, i have come to understand that the evangelical church is not for me. Saying this i loved every moment of it. I learnt so many lessons about the bible and religion and moral issues in life. I have sinse then experienced many other different churches and religions and beleive i have found where my beleifs lie. I dont beleive that nobody has any right to tell anybody what they should or shouldnt beleive in. Beliefs and religon is a VERY personal thing and people should be left to discover whatever they want!! This is how we all find our path in life!!

[naomi24]

Hello Bensmum, I know what you mean about not being an atheist, but not believing in God. I feel the same way to a degree. If a child of mine had religious leanings, I would discuss with them in depth the logic of religion in the hope that common sense and reason would prevail. However, if after that they were still determined, I would be very concerned, but I wouldn't stop them.

[jake-the-peg]

Personally I am an athiest.

I know a lot of athiests don't like the term as it's not necessary to have a specific term to define your lack of belief in trolls or fairies or goblins.

It's also a term that the religious seize to claim that we have a belief in disbelief and that indeed is faith.

Ironically your position is what I would call true athiesm. The philosopher Karl Popper pointed out that for a position to be truely scientific you have to admit the possibility that you might be wrong and say what evidence you'd accept to prove it.

This is the answer to the charge of faith in disbelief, your position is more rational than that of many athiests who will not accept the possibility that they might be wrong.

I have never tried to instruct my children as to what to believe although I have never made a secret of my position and have acted as a role model.

I think I'd find it difficult, but not unbearable if they became deeply religious but in their early teens now that looks pretty unlikely.

I guess in the words of Phillip Larkin
They f** you up your ma and da
They don't mean to but they do
They give you all the faults they had
and add some extras, just for you!

[keyplus90]

I am a Muslim, as few already know here. Islam believes that this life is just a test for the eternal life (hereafter), Test of the people who God has rewarded with his blessings like Health, Wealth, Wisdom and so on. They would be asked about how they utilized all what God gave them for the benefit of humanity, And those who God did not give that much, Their test is about Patience, Allah Says in Glorious Quran "Allah is with the one who is patience". Islam gives answers to all the possible questions in a human's life. As you may have good or bad even in one family where there are 4, 5 or 6 people, you get good and bad in societies as well. Just like other Religion's followers, All the Muslims are not following the true teachings of Islam. They would be asked for it. I have no doubt about that

[ghetto poet]

yo bensmum, im feelin ya babe. Im an athiyist and dont believe in god. But I once sore a ghost and think there is more out there. If my kids wanted to follow a religion I would support them to the fullest.

[China Doll]

I'd probably be classed as an atheist but I'm not really. I think my dad calls me a humanist or a spiritualist or on one occasion a 'bl00dy hippy who better not be smoking those funny fags... at least not without sharing.' He's a real role model ;0) Anyway, I don't believe in a God or some divine entity looking down from on high and judging us as to whether we ate meat or fish on a Friday etc... But I do believe in an 'other.' Not a being or anything but more a belief that things happen for a reason because we subconsciously change the world around us and target certain poeple in our lives. Is it just psychology? Probably but then... why? Until someone can draw a line under all my 'why's?' then I believe that there is something amazing about being alive and a lot out there that we don't understand and that could be possible until we prove they're not. (I realise that this is a less than scientific approach).

For those reasons, if any child of mine decided to embrace religion, short of questioning their sanity and why they feel the need for some dogma and indoctrination then I would feel happy that they found something that brought them comfort. I don't like it, I don't agree with organised religion but if that's how some want to find meaning in life then that really is up to them. The reverse happens in my family, my mother is very religious and I'm not, we still manage to do ok even if we both secretly think the other is a bit of a weirdo.

[Octavius]

Provided my children were safe and happy I like to think I would support and encourage them in any religious/non religious path they chose in life. Of course there are exceptions to this, but whether they believed in God or not would be up to them. I would know that they had the best start in their lives but on the choices I had made for them, so the rest would be theirs for the taking.

[WaldoMcFroog]

My responsibility is to bring my daughter up to think for herself, not force her to share my own beliefs. Although I would be disapointed if she became religious, as long as she could explain her reasons I'd respect it.

[bensmum]

Thank you everyone for your answers - I find other peoples' views on their beliefs quite fascinating.
jake - I really must start reading philosophers, my education is sadly lacking in that area!
China Doll - I get referred to as an old hippy!
Neither of my children has shown any religious leanings but if they did I would accept their right to their own beliefs.

[chakka35]

Sorry, bensmum, to be tardy in replying. My computer has been on the blink.

Three of my four children are Christians though I am a positive atheist and it doesn't bother me at all. Pleased to note, though, that, without ANY influence from me, two of them are having doubts. I expect they'll see the light one day.

If you don't believe in any god (out of the 2750 listed in a book on my shelf) then you are surely an atheist. However, you now seem to be leaning towards being an agnostic. I don't know what an agnostic is, or can possibly be, but I shan't clutter up this thread with that; I'll start a question of my own on the subject.

I am intrigued to wonder what it is in my style that makes you think I'm a "she". I am, alas, a mere male.

[Ice.Maiden]

My children haven't been baptized into any belief, even though both sides of the family are a mixture of faiths. We accept each other's differences and get on with things quite happily.
The children discuss various religions openly, and if they decided to follow one of them as they got older, I'd have no problem with it at all, so long as they'd questioned the expectations of such, and were satisfied that this was for them.

[naomi24]

Chakka I look forward to your question on agnostics. That should produce some interesting responses.