Well! I finally did it!!!!

[gness]

I always said I would never do it.....I have seen others do it.....I'm sure some of you have done it. In fact I think it was MrsO......sorry if I'm wrong there.....but I couldn't see how I would be so careless......until I was in a bar with my cousin last week.
Why was it the busy, well lit bar where it happened? I know how though.
I usually wear trousers.....tight "perky bum" jeans or long, very wide, flowing, hide a multitude of bumps and wobbly bits trousers. Go to the loo and haul up the trousers.....no problem. Wear a skirt for once....haul up the knickers and forget to check the skirt. The long, lined, lots of fabric skirt.....enough fabric to share between my legs at the front and the inside of my knickers at the back.
I walked through the bar with a rear end that must have looked like a hippopotamus with haemorrhoids.
It's the moment you smooth the skirt under the bottom before sitting down that makes the blood run cold....No skirt!.... Just lumpy knickers and bare legs. :-(
And lots of smiling faces looking your way.
Still, it was only marginally more annoying than the incident the previous day with the lock and the screw........Later for that tale. :-) xx

[Baldric]

Bit Flash gness even for you!
;o)

[tonyav]

LOL, only you gness, nice to see ya. Did you have a good time though ?

[gness]

Hi guys....nice to be back but have had a lovely time. The toe is mending. Luckily it was on the other foot....not the sledgehammer one. More later. xx

[Dee Sa]

lol poor you gness, have you been back to the same pub yet ?- how did that saying go ?--- I was always go to the same pub twice the second tme I go back to apologise ! All part of lifes rich pageantry me dear.

[murraymints]

DID THAT TOO !!..never a second one

[tonyav]

Oh gawd, what's happened ?

[gness]

No to going back to the pub...........why give one all the fun when I can do the rounds and spread the havoc? ;-)

[tonyav]

That's so true, gness lol.

[Flyhalf]

Can't wait for the next episode!

[redman41]

Wish I had been there with a Camera gness ! lol lol
Might have posted on You Tube :-))

[Psybbo]

Great to see you back safely, gness. I've been following the news to see if I could find your route by the reported trail of destruction but you mustn't have committed any serious crimes! I hope you had a lovely holiday. xxx

[gness]

Thanks!!!! The worry is now people have phones with camera things on them....I don't as you can guess. But a bottom could go nationwide before a scotch to recover from the embarrassment has been supped. :-(

[gness]

Hi Sib. Lovely time. No great disasters but seem to be having problems with loos and feet. Off to Ireland soon with daughter. You well?

[Psybbo]

Yes, fine thanks, I'll get in touch with RTE and Garda to get a nationwide alert about your forthcoming visit, or should I say impending, sounds more foreboding I bet you'll have a fabulous time but leave the taxi men alone :-)

[gness]

Thanks Sib but if you could not mention me to the Guardai please. The incident with the helicopter and the visiting foreign Premier is still remembered on the Parknasilla golf course. And then there was the lock-in in the Wrestler's pub. Oh dear........Perhaps I should go to Skeggie....d'you think?

[Psybbo]

Watch out for Father Jack

[Psybbo]

Oops getting my Skeggy and Craggy mixed up

[gness]

I'll watch for all the Fathers, Sib! It was fun watching our priest cross the bridge in the village when he was in his cups. The best one was when my brother was altar boy for the mid-night mass with the drunk priest. Half way through communion, in the days when the priest had to put the host in the mouth, he had a funny and started doing the hokey kokey with the wafers. In,out, in, out, shake it all about!!!!!! Parishioners desperately trying to catch the communion wafer on its way in...eyes rolling when he did the shake it all about bit. :-)

[Psybbo]

Gosh, if I'd known a priest like that I might...................