Is Hindsight a Wonderful thing?

[salisbury]

Hi, I split with my girlfriend a few months back and was devstated but am now realising that it was my first real experience of a relationship, and hopefully it wont be the last.....the reason for my more positive outlook now, is i went down to London to visit a mate and met a really nice girl in London.

The only problem there is the distance but I am keen to see her again sometime soon.

I was just thinking, do peopel usually have to go through a few serious relationships before they find the right one for them??

becaus e the last relationship i was in has taught me that i need to be frirmer and not do everything i am told, that I CAN still have mates and a girlfriend, not ONE OR THE OTHER! and also that life maybe is too short too worry about not p1ssin somebody off and I should just do WHAT I WANT TO DO.

I am 23 now and never really liked my exes mother, she was a right b1tch at times even to her daughter, and i cant help feeling ive had a lucky escape.

I just find now, that the dating scene seems a lot more interesting, where once i was in a ruch to settle down, I now want to asses everything (like if i like the girls parents for a start) and just BE SURE that she is right for me and the relationship would be a healthy one and not a stifling one!

Any comments would be greatly appreciated, I am young naieve and sometimes miss things that more mature people dont even have to think about.

Is there alwasy something better out there for us?

[4getmenot]

Thats a strange questions because if there is always something better out there for us then surely the girl you're after now isnt the one and it could go on forever really. Things do happen for a reason and even though you were hurt by the last you have found a nice girl. But from your past posts on here dont rush into things. I think the distance thing will be just right for a person like you as you seem to not have alot of self confidence and live your life thinking a girl will give you that. The distance thing will let you be you. Good luck. xx

[unruliejulie]

I think experience of these things goes a long way into making your next relationship more successful. You learn what you are prepared to accept and what you re not, you learn to let things go and accept that you are 2 different people and should treat each other with respect.

I had a couple of long term relationships (one marriage) before i met my husband now and we are very happy. I think a lot of it comes with age as well.

Sometimes in relationships we accept things that we are not always happy with, but i think a little bit of give and take goes a long way.

When a relationship breaks down and it feels like the end of the world at the time, i always think there is something else out there, i don't know about the use of the word better, but different is probably more appropriate.

I am a great believer in things happening for a reason!!!! Be happy, you are after all only 23, have some fun!

[Ed Strong]

Speaking as one of your 'mature people' I'd say that life offers no guarantees of happiness and we all muddle along as best we can. Yes, you will eventually meet the right person for you whether it's in 2 months, 2 years or 20; but, in the meantime enjoy everything that life offers; be responsible for your actions; treat people as you would like to be treated but above all remember you are only young once - ENJOY IT.

[Octavius]

I don't want to sound negative, but it just sounds like you are thinking about it too much. Just relax and go with the flow and enjoy things as they are. After a while you can think about how things will be or what you want from life and the relationship. Hopefully you will find someone that is the whole thing, it might be this girl, it might be the next or the one after, who knows. Just take your time.

There are no rules and age really has nothing to do with it.

[Pippa68]

What unrulie said :o)