Secret Facebbook Groups...??

[mattoc66]

I have just learnt that these groups exist. You can only join these groups by invitation only and will not show up in any search you make. Now as a parent of a 13 yr old girl who regularly goes on and uses this popular networking site surely these groups need to be made open or banned. One of the provisos I made before allowing her to sign up was that I could be added as a friend and monitor and check who she was adding as a friend like any concerned responsible parent would. I'm pretty sure that she hasn't joined one these groups and talking to anyone sinister but now knowing these groups exist, isn't it dangerous that a parent cant view the content and members of such groups if their child is in one??

[redcrx]

unless you are a friend of her friends you cant be sure what shes writing anywhere. If you are that concerned then you have the option of asking her for her password or stopping her use of facebook.

the secret groups are very handy for private groups and in my opinion dont need to be banned

[askyourgran]

Yes I agree, there should be no secrecy/privacy on any websites as far as young people are concerned. I would be very worried about that.

[redcrx]

by the way, secret groups arent sinister. I have a few set up for private groups of friends, such as ones to run alongside pregnancy forums where everything is public and they want a private group to share details with friends from the forum

[woofgang]

I never knew they existed and no I don't like the sound of that at all.

[bednobs]

why should they be banned? If you aren't happy (ps don't you have to be 15/16 to get an account on FB?) then just stop her going on, or as red says, use her account to check up on her

[bednobs]

i run 2 private groups and i assure you there is nothing sinister about either of them

[redcrx]

benobs, 13 is the age requirement. Not that its really checked.

[Eve]

Difficult one, there is only so much control you could ever have with that kind of site.

There are all kinds of ways of hiding information (eg stopping certain people from seeing certain information), you can't control who she chats to via message or messenger etc... or elsewhere on the web. I guess there has to be an element of trust involved (making sure they are properly educated as to potential risks,internet safety etc... and knowing they can come to you with anything they are concerned about).

With the availability of the internet these days, it's likely they could easily access it without your knowledge in any event should you try and stop them. Could be easier to keep an eye as much as you can with a willing and informed child who will let you.

[mattoc66]

your groups may well be good and innocent but how as a parent know that their child has joined one? Anyone can start up one. Its tantamount to a groomers paradise knowing that parents cant view and police them

[hc4361]

Lots of youngsters have a 'proper' facebook account the parents know about and check up on, and their real fb account under a nickname where they get up to the stuff they don't want their folks knowing about.
So easy to do.

[redcrx]

so as you are concerned that there are people out there you could use these groups (and any part of facebook really) why have you not got her password so you can check her inbox and what she is posting elsewhere?

[Answerprancer]

I don't think for a moment that social networking groups are anywhere near as rife with potential child molesters as the 'powers that be' want us to believe.

[askyourgran]

Are you suggesting that the private/secret groups are unchecked? I don't want to be thought as scaremongering, but could this be a paedos group meeting? a terriorist bombmaking group? A school bully confab? Ok maybe I'm OTT but unsavoury groups given a private thread would be like manna from heaven if left to flourish without being checked over regularly.

[mattoc66]

my point exactly askyourgran

[B00]

dont let her go on facebook then- problem solved.

[Lore]

The only way you can control this is by having her password or to do spot checks every so often. You only need to view her 'groups' setting to see where she's chatting. Don't forget, you don't need to be a 'friend' on Facebook to send a private message.

Maybe a chat is needed, showing you have every confidence in her to be safe online and know that she can always come to you to deal with any unknown persons who try to add her or send her a message.

Ask at her school, they will have information booklets on how to be safe when using the internet.

[redcrx]

so what makes facebook any different to the rest of the web? there are all sorts out there, you need to talk to your daughter about safety on the net.
if you dont think shes capable of knowing who are friends and who should be avoided then you still have those 2 options, remove her access or check her account directly by asking her for her password.

[sherrardk]

My eldest son has a computer in his room with internet access and he has a FB account. He is fully aware of the rules for using it (if we ask, he has to show us stuff, not to give out personal details, etc). He is astute enough to understand that just because someone might say they are a fellow teenager that they might not be. If anything 'strange' comes up he has to tell us about it. I am perfectly comfortable with him using both FB and the Internet.

[mattoc66]

I do have access to my daughters fb account and I know she isnt a member of a secret group but how many parents out there even knew about them? I just learnt they exist today. My concern is that parent will happily let their kids go on fb checking who their adding and interacting with but not knowing they could be in a "Secret Group" which wont show up in any newsfeeds, searches list of members in them..

[cazzz1975]

cant you log into her account?

failing that why not stop her using facebook if you are concerned..