What do you think?

[McMouse]

There was a time when I could sit on a bench by the common and watch the young mums playing with the toddlers on the swings and slide. Now I hurry past, in this climate where older men are seen as pervs if they show any interest in children. Even my wife would hesitate to comfort a distressed child who fell and cut themselves.

[ummmm]

It's a shame really.

A few years back my daughter was going to my Uncles (just down the road) on her scooter. She fell off and cut her leg. A man who seen it went over to her, asked where she lived and carried her and her scooter home. When I opened the door you could see he was worried about my reaction. I was very grateful though.

[bobjugs12]

I remember being sat on a bus with my heavily pregnant missus years ago. There was a mother and child on the seat in front of us. The kid was smiling at me, poking her tongue out, and generally playing like a nice child. I reciprocated the gesture and the little'un started laughing. At this point scummy-mummy turns round and starts calling me a paedo and screaming to get away from her daughter. My ex (at 8months pregnant) nearly knocked her out.

[China Doll]

I've never hesitated to comfort a child if they've fallen down in front of me (unless it was me that tripped them obviously) or had some other accident or indeed if I find one lost and crying while wandering around some supermarket. I know that child is safe with me until I find its folks and I'm confident that no one would ever accuse me of anything 'iffy'... And even if they did, I'm not afraid of that either, I'm far too vanilla for that accusation to hold any water.

Maybe it's because I'm female but I basically think it's a load of 'rollocks' this nonsense about people being afraid to approach a distressed and vulnerable child, it's instinct, you do it and most parents are just gratful you helped in my experience.

[Barmaid]

It is awful how we are so suspicious of everyone these days.

I remember in the winter when we took the kids sledging my step daughter hit a tree (oops, wasn't looking forwards to explaining that one to mum). I was first there and picked her up and checked her over. I felt that she was bruised rather than broken and I knew she hadn't hit her head. We took the decision to take her home, check her out properly and then to A & E if necessary.

A young man came over and offered his assistance saying he was first aid trained and would I like him to check her out. I've no doubt he was genuine, but I just wasn't about to take that risk. I very politely thanked him and said I felt that she was fine but shaken. he was fine with that, but I felt awful in declining his kind offer. I didn't want to put either of us in what at best could have been an awkward situation.

[McMouse]

My wife is a keen golfer and works with the juniors in the county. Even as a volunteer she is required to have CRB clearance and when taking youngsters to and from training sessions is strongly advised not to have a lone child in the car. So with 4 or 5 girls to drop off, the last two are dropped together and the parents called. It's madness.

[Bbbananas]

I would always help a child in distress, or an adult come to that. However I can understand McM's point about being a male and having to be wary and reticent these days. Shame...

McM (as an aside) - I had you down as a young single man, don't know why. !!

[McMouse]

Thanks??? Salla I'm an OAP married to a younger woman.

[China Doll]

I can understand it but I think it's unnecessary... Maybe I'll change my mind in a bit though, I'm going to work for child protection in the not too distant future and maybe my rebelious attitude (ahem) will be changed ;0)

[Bbbananas]

I think it's your rather naughty risque sense of humour and jokes McM - no offence meant. In fact - respect !!!!

[wendilla]

yes I would be the same I would help in a situation but theres nothing you can do if you are rejected when you know you are only helping. My grandson had an upset stomach at school and did not reach the toilet in time. He was very distressed .He was given a pair of pants and had to clean himself. He went back into class but was so embarressed he started crying and went toilet again . Teacher rang mum and she fetched him. Why could someone that could do the job and help him it would have saved him getting distressed and embarressed . He was only 5 at the time.

[redcrx]

if a child was in any danger or hurt or upset then i would act first and think later.
I would hope that any decent adult would do the same if my child were in trouble.

When on holiday a couple of years ago we were at a holiday park and the amount of lost children (my friend found a Downs child sat in her car one evening) was astounding. We took a few home to their parents, who were just enjoying their holidays, oblivious to what their children were up to.

One child was obviously lost in the entertainment centre, my friend and i walked slowly near her, never taking our eyes off her whilst our fellas found the nearest security guard for assistance. The mother, once found, didnt even say a word to us.

My son got seperated from me and Mr CRX last year at centre parks, i had left him with Mr CRX and walked away and little CRX ran after me. Mr CRX thought he was fine as i was so close. We didnt realise he was missing for 20 minutes and i have never been so grateful for a strangers help as i was that day. A lovely lady found him crying and took him straight to the staff, she even stayed with him to make sure he was OK til we got there.

Maybe i am too trusting but i feel that children do need to know that they can trust some people. Yes, tell them about stranger danger, but dont scare them into thinking that every stranger is a danger to them, they are not.

[looobylooo]

wendilla, ohh bless him .... at 5 how could he possibly sort himself out at that age ...

its so sad that things are how they are today ...


i remember years and years ago when i was about 11 or 12 or so, i was clumsily trying to get changed out of my cozzy under a big towel on the beach on holiday with my mum and dad, and we noticed a chap up on the wall behind us watching with his camera poised - had he already been taking photos? - and was he waiting for the towel to slip too?! ...

[jackthehat]

I was walking back home a few months ago and spotted a lad of no more than 3 playing in the gutter very close to a busy crossroads. There was no-one about who seemed to have charge of him. I kept my eye on him as I approached; he was still on the path, but.........
I managed to get to him and asked him where his Mummy was. He gestured into an amusement arcade behind him so I gently took his hand to lead him back.
Then a chap came up to me and said how pleased he was that a woman had come along. He'd been keeping an eye on the boy for some minutes, apparently; but afraid of making an approach he'd positioned himself so that if the boy had wandered into the road itself, he could grab him. He was worried about what could have been construed by a grown male stranger talking so a small boy.

Naturally, when I found the mother she didn't thank me...........

[vulcan]

I was trained in first aid and if any child living near me was hurt the Parents would come to me. I didn't mind this, but after a recent event I am very reluctant to touch anybody. A young girl, about twelve, fell off her bike and I went to assist her. She immediately said
"paedo" and "leave me alone".
Reluctantly I left her there,being a widower and living on my own,I realised
It doesn't take long for Parents to start to believe what they hear.
This country is in a sad state.

[Sqad]

I would not help a child in distress.
I would never help an adult in distress.
In an accident i would never go to the scene to help.
I would never open a door for a woman.
I would never stand up in a bus to let a woman have my seat.

That was when I was in the UK

Now in Menorca...I would do all the above.

[Sqad]

vulcan......don't blame the UK...it is the people who live in it that are to blame.

[Bbbananas]

What a sad statement to have to say about British society today. I think maybe sqad, that's taking things a tad too far... but I see your point.

It is very difficult to alert children to the dangers of paedophiles/molesters etc, without making them frightened or too suspicious of men or strangers in general. Difficult :-(

[ummmm]

People like you by the sounds of it.

[Sqad]

salla...I disagree.

Child in distress...you leave yourself open to label of paedophilia.
Adult in distress....you might get knifed.
Accident....you may well be sued if something was wrong or the outcome was unsatisfactory.
Open a door for a woman...vary rarely thank you or a smiling glance.
Give your seat up in the bus...a "mouthful" or ignored.

Knowt wrong in that philosophy.....surely......pragmatic anyway.

[ummmm]

Maybe you were living in a bad part of town.