Are you Scottish? You know you're a true Scot if��.
1. Ye can pronounce McConnochie, Ecclefechan, Milngavie, Sauchiehall St, St Enoch, Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake. 2. Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae the chippie. 3. Yer used tae four seasons in wan day. 4. Ye canna pass a chip/kebab shop without sleverin when yer blootert. 5. Ye kin fall about pished without spilling yer drink. 6. Ye see people wearin shell suits with burberry accessories- pure class! 7. Ye measure distance in minutes. 8. Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know characters just like him, in yer ain family. 9. Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it's like gaun tae the ocean. 10. Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds. 11. Ye know whit haggis is made ae and stull like eating it. 12. Somedy ye know used his fitba schedule tae plan thur wedding day date. 13. You've been at a wedding and the fitba scores are announced in the church/chapel. 14. Ye unry surprised tae find curries,pizzas,kebabs,fish and chips,irn-bru fags and nappies all in the wan shop. 15. Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas under it. 16. Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure. 17. Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums. 18. Finally, you are 100% Scottish if you have ever said/heard these words:- how's it hingin clatty boggin cludgie pished get it up ye wee beasties erse bandit amurny away and bile yer heid peely-wally Ba'-heid Baw-bag Mocket Mingin Dubble nugget!
The trains thing is desperate. I have a film, shot from the driver's cab of a Class 86 from Preston to Glasgow. The driver is a well-built chappie the noo, but starts to twitch a bit after Carlisle when the awful inevitability of Glasgow dawns upon him. Bravely he took his train in.I would have got off at Windermere and visited Jane Austen's cottage.
when i was a kid my grandad used to tell tales of his family and Auchtermuchty. Unitl about 3 years ago i still thought it was a made up place and that they were all tall tales lol
irn-bru doesn't cure a hangover, hair of the dog does, and you forgot deep fat mars bars, haggis and wash it all down with a bottle of buck-fast; then you know your scottish, oki doki
I'm scottish, live near Glasgow and I have to say that I have never came across a deep fried mars bar. I have never seen one, no one I know has seen one, or seen any place which sells them, neer mind even tried one!
I am not from Scottyland but this definitely amused me !
A mate of mine (who was from Scottyland) very seriously informed me one Saturday night (like after a huge quantity of ale) that if you fell over and lost consciousness, then you were drunk... otherwise, nope, not drunk !