Unsure about friendship

[karmgirl]

I used to be good friends with a girl in my year and form at school but when we left school we didn't keep in touch for long. We drifted apart because she liked pubbing and clubbing and I didn't. She was a lot more outgoing and confident than me as well which was also part of the reason I didn't want to go out with her.

Anyway, I recently saw her dad and he was telling me that I should go and see her in her new house with her bf (she'd just moved in) so I contacted her and we arranged a date, but then she was ill and I went on holiday and we never met up.

Well since then I haven't rearranged it - daily life getting in the way. Today I saw her dad again and he said that she was round his last night and told him she was pregnant.

I knew that she would be pregnant sooner or later so it wasn't too much of a shock, (bf, home.....baby) it makes sense. Now though (some of you know I have had an abortion and I have a problem with seeing pregnant women and it upsets me) I am unsure if I should still arrange to meet up with her. I am happy for her but I think it would make me feel awful if she kept telling me about the pregnancy.

[4getmenot]

have you had any help/counselling since the abortion? This is going to happen people will heve babies and probably will seem even more so with the way you feel. Have you told your friend? Maybe she would understand. I didnt know you'd had an abortion a difficult decision for anyone. xx

[karmgirl]

Hi 4get, I had a bit of counselling quite soon after abortion and again more recently but I didn't find it helpful.

I know its inevitable people are going to have babies and people close to me are going to have babies and I can't just shuit everyone off because of that otherwise I will end up really lonely. I wonder though that because I haven't seen this friend for a long time, is it worth rekindling the friendship especially at a time which is going to make it difficult for me and may cause problems between us, or should I let it fizzle out. Thing is though I could also really do with friends as I don't have any really apart from my housemate

[4getmenot]

Then explain to her and you never know once you start to talk about it and see her go through the pregnancy it might just be the breakthrough you need. Kinda like facing your fears.

[karmgirl]

Yeah thats true - it actually might have a positive effect on me I suppose.

I might text her now and arrange to meet her one evening this week.

Thanks 4get xxx

[4getmenot]

Good for you, you might aswell start somewhere. Hope all goes well. xx