Parents How Do You Put A Sleep Fighter To Bed?

Dreamsandlove | 04:08 Fri 15th Jul 2016 | Parenting

17 Answers

Friends child needs a sling to be rocked to sleep...then once she's asleep? You literally need to sit down and hold her for 2 hours so she sleeps. Any movements such as trying to put her in her bed...even in her sling she will cry and refuses to sleep. Friend won't leave the child to cry to sleep so please don't advise this as thst won't work. Trying to help her get this child to bed! She sleeps ok in her basket at night for some strange reason.

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douglas9401

"Friend won't leave the child to cry to sleep so please don't advise this as thst won't work"

Your friend is out of options then. The child has learned that making a fuss gets attention, reinforcing that will make for actual problems as years go by.
Close the door and tough it out, we've all been there.

woofgang

so why not let her sleep in the basket? How old is the child?

Cloverjo

The child should be put to bed with the mother by her side, not speaking or giving any attention, but giving comforting pats when necessary. She should start to sit further away each night until she's finally outside the room.

Cloverjo

It's going to be difficult, but she must be firm.

ummmm

I used to put mine in their buggies and rock them.

My first child was a good sleeper and never made a fuss. My second was a shock to the system and I was never going to go down the controlled crying route.

Old_Geezer

"Friend won't leave the child to cry to sleep so please don't advise this as thst won't work."

There's the first problem. A parent who is too soft to act like a parent should will cause problems both for themselves and their child. Is she is unprepared to tell the child that she is not putting up with her attention seeking and must learn to go to sleep like a good girl then there is no reasonable answer. The problem remains until the child grows out of it, or until her mum can stand not more and goers berserk. It is untrue it won't work. It is true that if the parent just keeps cracking and going in then it hasn't a chance of working. The parent is in charge (or should be, obviously not in this case) and needs to be firm.

As an aside what's she doing with a sling and not a bed anyway ? Get all sorted out in one fell swoop.

And what's this basket ? A dog basket ? A shopping basket ? I'm not saying it ought not be used but it seems to be giving the child the idea that they get whatever they want and hasn't helped.

Tell the mother to buck up and act like a parent. Decide how bedtime is going to be, insist on it being that way, and don't give in just because it's uncomfortable hearing one's child unhappy. Giving in is a grandparent's prerogative, not a parents.

Old_Geezer

... child. If she is ...
... a parent's.

woofgang

cry it out? Boy there are some nasty people on here.....

Patsy33

Hi, my daughter's baby girl was a nightmare to get to sleep too. My poor daughter didn't sleep properly for over a year. She was advised by another young mother to let her cry for a few minutes, then go in just to reassure her for a minute or two. Then leave the bedroom. When crying starts again, leave it a bit longer each time. My daughter tried this for a week and eventually granddaughter got the message. So it does work. Hope this helps. Your friend needs to toughen up a bit and persevere. All the very best.

Old_Geezer

Ever watched those Supernanny TV series when there is a kid playing up at bedtime ? Their solution was always to have firm rules, insist on them and let them play up until they learn it isn't producing the desired result. The moment the parent cracks and goes in to them, that's ruined it and they had to start again next night.

It's not like the child has anything really wrong that they need sorting, they're just manipulating the parents in order to get the attention they've got used to having on demand.

It's not nasty, it's tough love.

Patsy33

I agree OG. I'm thinking of the poor mother too. She'll be so glad at the end of it, if she perseveres with tough love. They'll both benefit.

ummmm

Yes OG...but some of us had other children and jobs to get up for!

Botox to that.

ummmm

OG - remind me again how many children you have?

How can you be too soft on a baby?

Old_Geezer

Child not baby.
The number of children one has is irrelevant to knowing what best practice is.