General Election

[corylus]

I've just received a letter from Theresa May and my local Tory candidate, I wonder what they want me to do?

[Jackdaw33]

Simples. Vote for them.

[Baldric]

Did it not say in the letter?

[Mamyalynne]

I've had 3 from Theresa, all identical - what a lot of money.

[corylus]

Will they expect a Christmas card from me?

[marval]

I keep getting e-mails from the labour party, asking me to donate. I will when hell freezes over.

[Kromovaracun]

My local Labour MP who I was badmouthing earlier today in News also put a leaflet through my door today.

Poor lamb. If only he knew that my vote belonged to another...

[Hopkirk]

Theresa wants your winter warmer back.

[mikey4444]

Haven't you got a spare nail ....on the wall of your outhouse Hoppy ?

[Jackdaw33]

My spare nail on the door of my privy is reserved for the Daily Mirror and the Guardian.

[DTCwordfan]

Keep them all; free toilet paper for the next Parliament. The Libs and Greens are chopping trees down here faster than the Brazilians can - not that Cornwall is awash in trees.