Advice To Women Regarding Sexual Harassment

[sp1814]

A few weeks ago, during initial reports on the Harvey Weinstein story, all we could hear were commentators apportioning blame on the women for not coming forward about this odious man. Some people went as far as to say that they share the blame.

Now, that women are coming forward with tales of sexual harassment, we being told that they are either 'too fragile' (Anne Robinson) or shouldn't come forward at all.

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/dame-ann-leslie-sexual-harassment_uk_5a00c58ae4b0baea26341588?utm_hp_ref=uk-homepage

So...what is it to be?

Should women brush off sexual advances, knowing that the perpetrator will do it to other women, or should they speak up, just in case the person in question is a serial sex pest?

[emmie]

speak up, i know what its like to keep quiet, you live with the guilt of it being your fault, when i was nothing of the sorts.

[mikey4444]

Speak up SP....and as soon after the event as possible.

Don't go to an authority that hush it up, like the Whips Office for instance....go straight to the Police.

[hereIam]

Definitely speak up.

[mikey4444]

Of course, if people do speak up, they run the very great risk of being branded part of a "Witch Hunt" as we have seen ample evidence of, on AB over the last week or two.

Not that it should stop them of course.

[naomi24]

It depends upon the nature of the 'crime'. If it's a fleeting touch of a knee and an invitation to go for a drink, as happened in one case recently, no. If it's a deliberate 'grope' or worse then yes.

[Mamyalynne]

One of the speakers there is right, we must be careful of lumping every single joke,comment and touch etc into the same category.

A minor infringement, deal with it and move on - anything more speak out.

[pixie374]

It depends what you mean by "harassment"...

[emmie]

some men don't take no for an answer. some women as well before anyone says.

[sp1814]

Is another 'knee touching' story apart from the one about former British Defense Secretary Michael Fallon.

If there isn't, then we should be careful not to think of that as being the whole story. Fallon said:

//I accept that in the past I have fallen below the high standards that we require of the Armed Forces that I have the honour to represent. What was acceptable 15, 10 years ago is clearly not acceptable now//

What he's referring to is anyone's guess, but for him to resign, I assume it was more than a casual stroke of the knee.

[sp1814]

pixie374

I'd define it as repeated sexual or intimate advances.

For instance, a manager who continually massages the shoulders of a member of staff, despite being given verbal or physical signs that its unwelcome.

Or repeatedly engaging in lewd or sexual conversations.

[sp1814]

pixie374

Those are what I would characterise as the starting point of harassment. I think that many people recognise more serious transgressions, but perhaps with the examples I gave just now, some might think they're just being flirty or funny.

[pixie374]

That doesn't sound like anything out of the ordinary... a push or slap or embarrassing them is often enough. At work, I would speak to their boss if they didn't stop. I wouldn't go to the police for those kind of things.

[pixie374]

Yes, exactly. There is a big difference between annoying and threatening.

[jno]

sp1814, Fallon had previous

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/commentisfree/2017/nov/04/michael-fallon-lunged-at-me-jane-merrick

It wasn't a one-off. Regardless of the cabinet infighting involved, he had to go. Handsy is bad enough, but lipsy? Ugh.

[naomi24]

SP, not Fallon.