Is The Uk Reaching The Point Where It Can No Longer Properly Function (Part One)

[New Judge]

Went to the High Street for a couple of items. Wanted a First Class stamp (rarely use stamps and hardly ever First Class). Anyway, Post Office Counter now located at the back of W H Smiths. It was ten to nine, Smith's open, Post Office counter not yet. “Not to worry” thought I, “I’ll get one from the machine.”

Machine switched off. Two bods behind PO ramp drinking tea. Conversation goes thus:

NJ: “Can you switch the machine on please. I want to buy a stamp”

PO Bod (POB): “No. We’re not open yet. It’s Tuesday today, we don’t open until 9:30”

NJ: Yes I know that [though I don’t know why they don’t open until 9:30. “Training” no doubt – training to drink tea]. I only want to get a stamp from the machine”

POB: “No can do. We cannot switch the machine on until we’re open”

NJ: “But what’s the point of having a machine if it can only be used when the counter is open?”

POB “Dunno really mate. Probably something to do with Elf n’ Safety”

NJ retired and went home to stick a second class stamp on his letter. It probably makes little difference anyway and I could do with the exercise trudging down to the pillar box when I had the letter in my hand ready to post in the High Street.

[rowanwitch]

Yes, and Wrigley chewing gum machines .

[tamborine]

My postman sells me stamps

[New Judge]

"Yes, and Wrigley chewing gum machines ."

You used to get two packets of gum every four sales. There was an arrow on the handle and if it was pointing forwards you were in for double bubble! And it was open 24/7 :-)

[anneasquith]

Stamp machines ...... Did this 30 years ago ?

[Mamyalynne]

I didn't know we still had stamp vending machines either, yes it should be open .

I buy my stamps online in bulk, but I do use a lot of them.

[Togo]

It's the same with the condom machines in Boots Judge. Has to be someone behind the counter in case a punter tries to put one over his head just to prove that he is indeed a hobnead. :))

[Mamyalynne]

Sometimes the long school holidays drag.

[sanmac]

Remember the machines outside the local shops selling 6-packs of Woodbines?

[david small]

New St station in Birmingham, used to have a chilled milk vending machine. I was a regular purchaser.

[New Judge]

Yes I remember those. Very handy when you returned from holiday. We also had a paraffin vending machine on the outside of the local "oil shop". Two Bob (10p) a gallon

[douglas9401]

W H Smith? Count your blessings, our one's in a Spar.

They have a single PO point at the checkouts for when the 'main' one is closed. Of course it can't be used when the real one's open, that would bring convenience to a convenience store.

[tonyav]

david small New St station in Birmingham, used to have a chilled milk vending machine. I was a regular purchaser.

Yes I remember that as a kid, david.

[douglas9401]

Ah, railwat station vending machines. I remember the KitKat one dispensing a five-fingered bar as no change could be given, the price being more than that of the standard four finger in the shops and the casual scalping of the traveller hadn't properly taken hold.

[tonyav]

I remember the KitKat one dispensing a five-fingered bar as no change could be given, the price being more than that of the standard four finger in the shops

Yeah a bit like those cigarette vending machines that dispensed packs of 19 that cost more than a pack of 20 in the shops.

[douglas9401]

No Tony, the opposite of that.

[tonyav]

Ah yes, I see now 5 not 4.

[New Judge]

Some more information!

I made some enquiries of Post Office Counters. Apparently, the reason the machine cannot be used whilst the counter is closed is "in case any customers encounter difficulties" with their transactions. I accept that the machine does not simply dole out stamps, but it also weights items and calculates prices so things might get a bit tricky. I suggested that all that was needed was a big red button which would enable customers to have returned any money deposited should they "encounter difficulties" but was told that could not be done.