Will Rest Bite Make Dementia Worse??

[Lizruns]

My dad has dementia, I am in desprate need of a brake with my family, but I am worried it will make him worse and unsettle him when I come back, and I only want a week and it is 2 weeks standard which is 1600.00 I feel bad to do it, I do not have any help other than the day care centre.

Advice please

[woofgang]

It might make his behaviour better. Speaking professionally, I have seen many people with dementia do better once they are in a calm stable environment being cared for by people who are used to the work. There is no evidence (and I don’t believe) that respite in a good facility will speed or slow the actual progress of the disease. Are you getting support from any organisation?

[Tyrion44]

This is a very difficult time for you. However you also need a break. Can you find a respite centre for him nearby and introduce him to it gradually in the weeks before you go. No standard answer as all dementia patients react in different ways. Good luck.

[Khandro]

You deserve a break, and the interesting thing about dementia - which is in your favour- is that sufferers have a short attention span and a very short term memory. He maybe can remember things with clarity from years ago, but cannot remember what he ate for lunch, so you absence will not be as big a problem for him as you fear and it won't make him "worse".
Have a holiday, and bring him back something nice.

[Lizruns]

I get support from the day care centre, who are amazing and they do mix with a residential home which is all part of the wellbeing centre and where he would go for rest bite an be brought over to the day care daily. I am just worried as my dad is only 66 and young to have Dementia.

[andy-hughes]

You have to balance your father's needs with your own.

Were your father lucid, I have no doubt that he would encourage you to take a break from a stressful situation - because he is not, i think you can take that encouragement as read, and have your break.

[Lizruns]

Thank you, Its my Girls I want to treat and give them just mine and my husbands attention for 1 week.

[Barmaid]

I can only speak from personal experience because as a family we have had to manage a similar situation for the last couple of years and the last year or so it has been acute.

My experience is that carefully managed respite will not make matters any worse. The nature of dementia is not normally situational - but is as a result of a physical injury or deterioration in the brain. Whilst a changing situation could cause a little anxiety in the patient, that can normally be alleviated by professional care givers.

In my view, respite for the primary care giver is extremely important not just to them but to their family and also the patient. A lack of a break means that the cracks will show eventually.

Reassure yourself of the quality of the respite. Talk to the care provider at length, make sure they meet your father. Perhaps have respite in place for a few days before you go away so that you can take comfort that he is being properly cared for.

This is a desperately hard situation and I feel for you, but it will NOT make matters worse.

[Lizruns]

Thanks Barmaid, It is very hard and hate making decisions like this, Can I ask without being nosy, was you caring for a parent?

[Lizruns]

Barmaid

The place where restbite is he is already famliar with and goes over there with daycare centre for Sing songs / Music / and Entertainment, he is really friendly and just worry about repercussions..

[Barmaid]

No a grandparent, Liz. But my mother is his only child so my siblings and I have played a significant role.

I do not believe that there are likely to be any repercussions from the situation you describe. Although that is only from personal experience.

We did have a period of respite which was organised in an emergency where the home was shocking and we withdrew him after a few days. There were no repercussions on his condition though. Looks like you have a much better situation.