do i tell mum??

[littlemissx]

my younger bro (20) has found a lump down belw so went to the dr on monday and they have referred him for an urgent scan tomorrow. he is really worried but came to my house to obviously talk about it but asked me not to tell mum as it would worry her... would you tell her??

i think she would rather know but then obviously i am betraying his trust??

[laurence2]

scernario, something serious gets highlighted on the scan {god forbid} do you tell your mum then?

[littlemissx]

yes he would tell my mum then but she would kill us both for not telling her initially

[redcrx]

I would like to think that in that situation i would be able to follow my brothers wishes but would try my hardest to persuade him to tell her himself, even if it was after the scan but before results were known.

I hope that it turns out to be nothing to worry about.

[steviep165]

i have a sister who lives in spain. last year our dad was admitted to hospital with a very serious chest infection and my mam and dad made me swear not to tell sis, so against my better judgement i didnt.
after my father was released they told my sis and she went ballistic with me for not telling her.
on the other hand i cant imagine my mam and dad being overly chuffed if i had told my sis.
whatever you do someone is going to be angry, but speaking from personal experience i would tell your mam.

good luck to everyone.xx.

[Champagne]

I'm with steviep. No matter how close your family may be if your brother has told you in confidence then you shouldn't betray his trust in you. You'll just have to bear the consequences of your mother being upset with you but she won't hold a grudge for long. Bear in mind that he's only keeping it from her so she doesn't worry unnecessarily. Hopefully it won't come to that though.

[yesmadam]

could you persuade your brother to go and tell mum if you go with him. Sometimes a brother and sister team are good in these situations, and he did come and tell you.
Please go together, it will make it easier.

[jiggy-gb]

Please don't go against your brother's wishes. If you tell your mum, chances are he'll never confide in you again, and may well need to some time in the future. It's his news to tell, and hopefully there'll be no need for him to say anything anyway, so you could be worrying your mum for no reason at all.
I'm on the receiving end of a health secret of my younger brother at the moment, and though I do think he should tell our mum, it certainly isn't my place to make that decision. Just be patient and wait for the results to come through before making any decisions?

[puddycat]

Your brother has come to you because he feels he can confide in you - he trusts you. If you break this confidence who will he be able to turn to if he needs someone to talk to again? You need to be there for him and support him in the way he wants. If that means not telling your mum then don't. I'm sure she'll understand and at least he'll continue to trust and confide in you.

Hope everything works out ok xx

[Robinia]

I wouldn't tell her at this point....As a mother of two adult sons I would hate to think they'd 'suffered in silence' over anything but in your case I'd be relieved that he'd at least told someone & done something about it straight away.

All the best to your brother & I hope it all works out ok.

[Presario]

I was in the exact same situation. My brother went to hospital and got the lump checked out and luckily it turned out to be nothing serious. So there was never any need to worry mum, plus my bro now knows he can talk to me in confidence if he needs to. Good luck to your brother!