The K M Links Game - November 2024 Week...
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Colleague Trouble
5 Answers
I am based in an office with other women and they are all really bitchy. They talk about almost eveyone in the organisation.
The thing is they are really awkward with me all of the time. I am quite an intelligent person however, when I am around them I make more mistakes and I come out with saying stupid things (i think this maybe because I am conscience of them annaylising things etc).
They always give me the most awful evil looks for no reason at all.
When I ask for help they always try and make look stupid in front of my managers. I did approach my manager a the beginning of the year and nothing was said. Sometimes they stop this behaviour. It depends if they're bored.
I am wondering if it is me.. at the fact that i sometimes say silly things. They always pick up on the most stupidist of details which try and make me look daft.
I wont approach my manager about this again, as I dont think it would help the sitution. They would only get worse.
Can anybody give me advise on how to behave around them. Perhaps I shouldn't talk about my home life...?
The thing is they are really awkward with me all of the time. I am quite an intelligent person however, when I am around them I make more mistakes and I come out with saying stupid things (i think this maybe because I am conscience of them annaylising things etc).
They always give me the most awful evil looks for no reason at all.
When I ask for help they always try and make look stupid in front of my managers. I did approach my manager a the beginning of the year and nothing was said. Sometimes they stop this behaviour. It depends if they're bored.
I am wondering if it is me.. at the fact that i sometimes say silly things. They always pick up on the most stupidist of details which try and make me look daft.
I wont approach my manager about this again, as I dont think it would help the sitution. They would only get worse.
Can anybody give me advise on how to behave around them. Perhaps I shouldn't talk about my home life...?
Answers
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Basically they are bullies and gossips, feed them very little info because people like that use every little snippet they can gleam to get at people so empty is their lives, and dont be intimated around them, look them in the eye and give as good as you get, as with all bullies most are cowards by nature, dont worry about what you say might be wrong say what you want when you want to who you want, be sure that they are talking about the others in their little harem when that person isnt there, its just what some people do when their own lives are dull and uneventful. Just do your job and let them be petty and do not give them an inch x x x x x xx x
Hi Hun,
I know what you feel like, its horrible if you do not 'click' with colleagues. We have departments full of middle aged divorced women in my company who are really negitive to anyone else and want all the attention from the men. They get on my nerves, especially when you find faults in their work - usually because they are too busy eyeing up some poor defenceless office boy!
Is there anyone in your office who feels the same, or who you could become friendly with? The worse thing is - you dont want their behaviour or the atmosphere to drive you out of the company if you like your job.
The fact they make you feel uncomfortable, will be the reason you sometimes say silly things, but you are right when saying its because you are concentrating too hard not to let them find a fault in whatever you are doing/saying.
I would put it down to their insecurity - however that doesnt much help you! If you cant speak to a manager - how about speaking to your HR department, or discuss it at your next appriasal. I dont think by confronting the girls will help - it may make them worse!
Good luck!
I know what you feel like, its horrible if you do not 'click' with colleagues. We have departments full of middle aged divorced women in my company who are really negitive to anyone else and want all the attention from the men. They get on my nerves, especially when you find faults in their work - usually because they are too busy eyeing up some poor defenceless office boy!
Is there anyone in your office who feels the same, or who you could become friendly with? The worse thing is - you dont want their behaviour or the atmosphere to drive you out of the company if you like your job.
The fact they make you feel uncomfortable, will be the reason you sometimes say silly things, but you are right when saying its because you are concentrating too hard not to let them find a fault in whatever you are doing/saying.
I would put it down to their insecurity - however that doesnt much help you! If you cant speak to a manager - how about speaking to your HR department, or discuss it at your next appriasal. I dont think by confronting the girls will help - it may make them worse!
Good luck!
My advice is to look elsewhere for employment to be honest as my wife whose a very nice, very strong, very easy to get on with woman who never had any problems anywhere working came across exactly the same problem during one project with some people she worked with and they made her life a MISERY. She didn't work in an environment where anyone could do anything for her eally but if she'd had to stay any longer than the couple of years it took her to complte it, she'd have had a nervous breakdown, so look around for something else if you can, because people like this never change, shallow unpleasant wastes of oxygen is all they are.
Just ignore them and feel slightly superior as it sounds like you have a more mature outlook/attitude (for want of better words!!) than them.
when i first started in my job there were always the ones that let ya know they were 'in' wiv the management and looked down on newcomers.......i would smile n say good morning to all staff regardless of who they were, but i soon learned to give back the same 'evil looks' as i received, knowing that one day they would have to come to me for something (due to the nature of the job) and they would then be the ones eating humble pie.......great feeling tho....HA!
when i first started in my job there were always the ones that let ya know they were 'in' wiv the management and looked down on newcomers.......i would smile n say good morning to all staff regardless of who they were, but i soon learned to give back the same 'evil looks' as i received, knowing that one day they would have to come to me for something (due to the nature of the job) and they would then be the ones eating humble pie.......great feeling tho....HA!
I have worked with people like this before and it can be awful, we spend so much time at work so to have something like this going on can really be a pain.
If I were you I would just try and avoid them as much as possible and if you can't then whenever you have to talk to them keep your cards close to your chest... don't tell them anything about your home/personal life. Just talk about work or if you have to listen to them then do but not giving them any information about you will give them no ammunition, you won't feel as if they are annalising you or your personal circumstances and hopefull start to feel more confident around them and not make mistakes in front of them.
If I were you I would just try and avoid them as much as possible and if you can't then whenever you have to talk to them keep your cards close to your chest... don't tell them anything about your home/personal life. Just talk about work or if you have to listen to them then do but not giving them any information about you will give them no ammunition, you won't feel as if they are annalising you or your personal circumstances and hopefull start to feel more confident around them and not make mistakes in front of them.
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