Playing games

[Tock389]

Hello. Here's a conundrum for you. I have been chasing this girl. I asked her out once - she was busy. I asked her again, but she was busy again, so I said "let me know if you want to go out" i.e putting the ball in her court. And have just left it since.
Anyhow, every time I have seen her since, she is quite flirty and asks after me, and we just generally chat.
I get the feeling she is playing a bit hard to get, or is just trying to get me know me a bit better...but..I don't want to come across as too keen, or slimy, so I am inclined to just let things continue- especially if she just wants to be friends.

Come on girls, am I doing the right thing by playing cool?

[lady_p_gold]

I think you are doing exactly the right thing and there are two possible scenarios going. Either she is keen to go out and finds it difficult to say directly "yes I would like to" and is flirting and chatting hoping you will re-ask ... or she never wanted to go out with you and is sort of chatting and being friendly in a sort of 'I want to be friends and it was nice of you to ask me no hard feelings' kinda way. So its tricky. I think I would test the water and next time she flirts just say in a jokey way 'is there ever going to be a chance of going out with you .. deal or no deal ???' and just see her response. If she says no again then I would give it up as a lost cause. Another thing would be to get her e mail address, its a lot easier to ask like that !!

[4getmenot]

Or maybe she was busy as she said.

[Loosehead]

She get's her jollies by rejecting you, she just wants you to ask again so she can get another fix. Steer well clear, loony alert!

[janetsflower]

Ask another girl out, someone she knowes but not her best friend, if she is keen on you you will soon know by her reaction when she finds out you asked someone else out

[Carakeel]

You are a gentleman and doing the right thing! Good on you! Even though some men don't accept this, women do sometimes just want to be great friends with a man. I have the most loving partner and he means the world to me. We support each other in every way and I would never do anything to hurt him. He knows that my closest friend, apart from him, is a very handsom young man, who is far younger than me and who has been my best friend for over 25 years now. He has recenly married and I am absolutely delighted for him and his bride, who is also becoming a lovely friend. So, friendships between men and woman can and do work, even longterm. Unlike Loosehead, try to see the positive in her behaviour and let things go their natural course. This way, if you don't end up in a loving relationship with her you may still end up with a great friendship. I wish you well.