Care Patient

[jennyjoan]

This lady has been in care for a number of years now but it gets a little complicated.

At the beginning when lady was sick, husband looked after her himself at home but for some mysterious reason he stopped all communication with her friends (while he was looking after her and did so for about 3-4 years.

Now the husband has died unexpectedly about 2 months ago and nobody knows where the lady is. A number of her friends would really love to visit her but don't even know where to start.

They heard (I don't where) that she is in a care home in Kircubbin and she (care patient) actually wrote a lovely letter to one of her friends (but no address on the letter).

Is there anyway the friends can find out where she is. I know her myself and so I started to look at a few care homes in Kircubbin but the homes are not answering their phones. I did only phone 2. Any ideas please.

[rowanwitch]

Send a standard letter to all the homes in the area, saying the friends of Mrs X are trying to get back in touch. A brief explanation about her late husbands action might help. The homes can't tell you if she is a resident but can let her know that you are looking for her and you would like her to get in touch. Add a page of your names and contact details. Also copy it to the local social services elderly care dept as she may be out of area. Ask for it to be passed on to the appropriate setting. I have traced a friends rather by phoning round. Every one I got through to said ' no one here by that name's except one that said ' we can't tell you '. Sorted!

[aelmpvw]

might not be much help but here's a list of care homes near kirkcubbin
https://www.carehome.co.uk/care_search_results.cfm/searchtown/Kircubbin

[THECORBYLOON]

You could send an e-mail rather than a letter, using the links shown in that website.

[jennyjoan]

yes Ael - have looked at the site but as I say - it is actually difficult to even get a phone number - one of them rung for about 7 times and cut off.

Thanks Rowan - that is a good idea.

If I can - there may be emails on those sites and I could type one email up and send to the whatever number of homes there are in Kircubbin and another one to local social services elderly care dept

when you say local social services elderly care dept - where would that be - say would "local" be in Kircubbin or Belfast per se. Thanks

[Redhelen72]

Could you report her as missing?
Why have they left it so long to try and get in contact with her?
Any other family that may know where she is?

[rowanwitch]

It's going to be whatever the local council is, possibly Belfast or even at county level.

[barry1010]

Would a care home be able to confirm that the lady lived there, especially if she has dementia or similar and can't give consent for that information to be given out?

[Prudie]

Gosh all sorts of things come to mind. Does anyone know she's even still alive? As redhelen says, didn't she have other family? And I agree with barry, not sure any care home would divulge who's staying there without valid proof of consent.

[pastafreak]

And if she is still alive, and doesn't have dementia...the isolation and loneliness must be terrible. To not know why no one has been in contact is a terrible thought.