U K Raises Alert Level.........

[ToraToraTora]

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent Russian threats and have therefore raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved.”
Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross.”
The English have not been “A Bit Cross” since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies nearly ran out.
The Russians have been re-categorised from “Tiresome” to “A Bloody Nuisance.”
The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from “*** Off” to “Let’s Get the ***.”
They don’t have any other levels.
This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide.”
The only two higher levels in France are “Collaborate” and “Surrender.”
The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country’s military capability. They have also started wearing their reversible coats.

Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout Loudly and Excitedly” to “Elaborate Military Posturing.”
Two more levels remain: “Ineffective Combat Operations” and “Change Sides.”

The Germans have increased their alert state from “Disdainful Arrogance” to “Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs.” They also have two higher levels: “Invade a Neighbour” and “Lose.”

Belgians on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual;
the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy.
These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Australia meanwhile, has raised its security level from “No worries” to “She’ll be alright, Mate.” Two more escalation levels remain: “Crikey! I think we’ll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!” and “The barbie is cancelled.” So far, no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

[Stickybottle]

THECORBYLOON
"the thing with the British is we have the ability to laugh in the face of adversity."

How does our adversity compare to those in Ukraine?
———
That was going to be my question too

We are no exactly suffering privations atm
The scenes of children in air raid shelters in Kyiv is however reminiscent of the Blitz
Shocking that it is being repeated some 75 years later

[sanmac]

They were German death-camps, not Nazi.

[Atheist]

sanmac; What do you mean? I thought the Nazis were the government at the time.

[jourdain2]

Of course we are not suffering - at the moment. But the writing is on the wall. It is a time for realism and a huge proportion of our people are going to have to wake up and reassess. Life has changed, simple as that.

We can live in hope, pray and try to help those in peril and make our own preparations. This could escalate into realms which we can scarcely imagine.