I have been seeing a man 12 years older than me for 6 years now. i split from my husband (for him) and he promised that we would get together. 6 years down the line, he still lives in his house and I live in mine!!! I asked him to get married, but he said he wasn't ready, I asked him to move in but he didn't seem keen. I see him at weekends, but feel i have put my life on hold waiting for him to make a decision. He is a great man, loving and generous and good to my children.......but I feel our relationship is going no where. What do I do.....do I wait until he is ready to make a decision? I am getting to the stage where I am enjoying my own company and wondering if getting together would be the right thing to do. I can't imagine life without him, but then again, I would like some stability.
it all depends what you want for yourself in the future?
if you are happy to look down the line in 5 yrs for now and your relationship is still the same then fine...if you would expect more then i would say its time for a serious chat...
I look at my life and think, that compared to other people, i am lucky.
I have a good man, but I also want to be part of a 'family unit' again which is very important to me. He seems to be quite happy to be on his own. What worries me though, is what happens if he gets ill or can't look after himself.....which hopefully is a long way off yet....i want to be there for those reasons. I don;t want to be living between two houses, which is what I am doing now.
It looks like he has the best of both worlds. He has his independence and he has you when it suits him. I reckon there will be a lot of people who envy him. However, if you are happy with your arrangement then fine - if not perhaps you need to give him an ultimatum. I hope you get what you want - being in limbo isnt much fun!