Gassed

[aka pixi]

Help, this is gonna sound like a wind up but I promise its true. There is a woman at work who does the most obnoxious farts all the time. I have only ever heard about this and never experienced it but yesterday me and my mate were at least 20 feet away from her and the smell was horrible. We both ended up retching really bad. It was worse for my mate cos she couldnt move from where she was whereas I could (I had to keep running round the back of the machine to get away from it) Now you are probably all laughing at this, both me and my mate were laughing our heads off at each others reactions to it but its honestly horrible. We are both terrified of going to work today, no joke. Have you ever been in this situation and if so what did you do? Please someone offer some suggestions as to what we can do in future cos I really believe one of us will end up throwing up all over the factory floor :( Thanks

[beryllium]

Pixi Pixi Pixi!!! big smiles to you:-) sorry to hear about such ghastly fumes coming your way..... the only thing I could suggest is an addition to ones uniform really.....

http://www.shanghaiist.com/attachments/shang_d an/gasmask.jpg

Lots of Love
B xxxxxxxx

[aka pixi]

berylllllllllllllllllllllllllll yayyyyyy great to see you again :D how the heck are you?


ta for the link, thats one stylish looking mask lol, I would wear one of those just for fun :D We have dust masks at work and were gonna find some yesterday but decided they wouldnt work, Im gonna write your link down and bob it on my bosses desk lol

[beryllium]

Gosh it's lovely to see you :-) all is mad here and haven't been to froggers.... too much at once me thinks lol....
and lots of building work going on here too....
the mask? looks a bit like an old work one to me lmao :-)
Luv Ya Hun xxxxxxxx

[aka pixi]

aww you are missed on froggers :( hope you get time to bob on and see us all :D

erm Im wondering whether you get the whole mask with the cool headbit as well as the breathing bit lol, thats why I liked it so much ;)

good luck with the builders.

If I dont see you before, have a lovely christmas and new year.

take care
xxx

[beryllium]

I'll pop in and say hi....

Merry Christmas and good luck with your farting colleague..

B. xxxxxxxx

[PinkFizz]

How about doing just that - throw up on the factory floor - then when she asks what's wrong you can say that you have just smelt the most vile fart known to mankind and whoever did it should be shot! She may just get the hint!

[aka pixi]

lmao, thanks for that fizzy, it may come to that if it happens again today lol

[jno]

strike a match, pixi, burns up noxious fumes. I keep a box in the loo and it works. (If anyone asks you why you're doing this, tell them.)

[Drisgirl]

I just say-well that certainly was not me -that is rank!!!!


Bery -missed ya mwah mwah mwah xxxxx

[drestie]

jno reminds me of that news story from last week about the lady on the airplane who was lighting her farts! Grounded the plane!!

(Hi pixi, BTW!)

[drestie]

Oh and pixi, are you actually allowed to wear masks?
If so, any facemask that is labeled as filtering out organic vapors would suffice.

[aka pixi]

thats a great idea jno but we cant take flammable stuff onto the factory floor, thanks anyway

dris I would have shouted something along those lines but I didnt dare open my mouth to talk in case I threw up :(

hiya estie, hope you are well and happy :D lmao at the aeroplane story, heres my all time favourite lighting a fart video lol https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00DxlZPea20
the masks we have are just dust masks so im not sure they would work against the smell but im definately gonna try them if it happens again.

You know whats puzzling me about all this? The fact that we were both really on the verge of throwing up but laughing hysterically at the same time. How the heck can that happen? maybe it was the shock to the system or summat?

[Roughquest]

Next time you smell this alledged stench why not pipe up and mention loudly "Jees what IS that awful stench? Can anyone smell that?" then see what reaction there is......she may get the hint, she may have a medical problem though....

[raysparx1]

I would give her a "cup cake" that is when you want to fart stand near her, cup your hand by your bum fart into it then straight away put your cupped hand over her mouth and nose and say "cup cake" she will soon stop it !!!

[Athley]

If you light a match near a fart won't it explode!!

How do you know its definintely her as well - may be anyone who thinks they can now cover up cos she'll always get the blame!!

He he he bit like blaming the dog at home!

[aka pixi]

lol roughquest, to be honest though I hope there isnt a next time :s

lmao ray, if I did that I think I would die laughing.

Athley its definately her, most of us at work fart and we all announce it and we all have a laugh whether it smells or not but this womans farts are chronic and all smell the same so even if its an occasion when she doesnt admit it we know its one of hers :(