ChatterBank0 min ago
Any more suggestions?
4 Answers
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Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly
neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply� alternate meanings for common
words. The winners are:
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1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
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2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
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3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
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4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
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5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
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6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in
your nightgown.
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7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
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8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
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9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a
steamroller.
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10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
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11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
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12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
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13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
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14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
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15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your
Soul flies up on the roof and gets stuck there.
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16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly
neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply� alternate meanings for common
words. The winners are:
�
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.
�
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.
�
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
�
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
�
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
�
6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in
your nightgown.
�
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
�
8. Gargoyle (n.), olive-flavored mouthwash.
�
9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a
steamroller.
�
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
�
11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.
�
12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
�
13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
�
14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
�
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your
Soul flies up on the roof and gets stuck there.
�
16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
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The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the
dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new
definition. Here are this year's winners:
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1. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the
near future.
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2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
�
3. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially
impotent for an indefinite period.
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4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
�
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't
get it.
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6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
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7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness
.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit).
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9. Karmageddon (n): its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
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10. Decafalon (n): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things
that are good for you.
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11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
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12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at
you rapidly.
�
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
�
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in
the morning and cannot be cast out.
�
15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half
dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new
definition. Here are this year's winners:
�
1. Bozone (n): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from
penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the
near future.
�
2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
�
3. Cashtration (n): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially
impotent for an indefinite period.
�
4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
�
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't
get it.
�
6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
�
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness
.
8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit).
�
9. Karmageddon (n): its like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes,
right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
�
10. Decafalon (n): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things
that are good for you.
�
11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.
�
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at
you rapidly.
�
13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked
through a spider web.
�
14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in
the morning and cannot be cast out.
�
15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half