Who is calling who

[cosmo1779]

Should I give up on a guy who doesn't call and says he loses track of time? He says he is afraid to move to quickly because he has been badly hurt in the past. Help!!

[Sasha13]

Nope you shouldn't necessarily give up, but you shouldn't call him either. If he carries on not calling there's only one reason - he's not interested.

[HJT40]

I was seeing a guy who had this problem, I would call, he wouldn't answer, I would text or email, he wouldn't answer. Then he would contact me out of the blue, "Hey how are you stranger!" I put up with it for too long and he puts it all down to being hurt. I think you should give him a chance, but know when it is time to give up. We are friends now, but he cannot see how he treated me was wrong, using the excuse that he has been hurt, which is not an excuse to do it to someone else. What ever you do keep your self respect and don't chase after him! I learned by my mistakes!

[joko]

no wonder he got hurt if that the way he carries on, HJT!

if it happens once in a while then ok, he's human, but all the time, then don't believe him when he says its because he has been hurt...i mean, how in the hell does doing that make him safe from being hurt again? how does ignoring you equate to him being afraid?
its an excuse to keep you on tap for as and when it suits him.

if it were true he would be worried about you hurting him and want to be extra attentive so that you didn't!!

do the same back to him - see how he likes it

[sarnieken]

If the guy was hurt and doesn't want to be hurt again etc, blah blah blah then he clearly isn't ready for a relationship yet and shouldn't be leading you on.

He maybe doesn't know he's doing it but I would recommend leaving him be an not chasing him. If he's serious then he has to realise that not all girls are going to hurt him. If he can't then he should make sure he isn't hurting you by leading you on.

(Yes, I'm a guy but I have mates who do this and its tempting to punch them when they do this to girls)

[cosmo1779]

Thank you to all of you!! And yes even the guys perspective! That is just as important.

I have decided to leave him alone and if he calls me great but otherwise he is hurting me too much with this game.

Thanks for putting it in perspecitive!!

[HJT40]

Thank you Joko!

Cosmo I wish I had asked this question ages ago, it would have saved me a lot of heartache, not least being told of for hurting him by not talking to him a week ago when we were on duty together! Apparently I am rude! With people like this I guess you just can't win. Its their way or no way at all! Glad you have been strong enough to see it this early. Poor boy doesn't know what he is missing does he? ;-)

I wish you luck in finding happiness and love with the right person...................