What should I do?

[DJerba]

Ok I feel I'm kinda stuck in a rut and some advice would be great, tell me what you think of this -

My Best friend, lets say his name is Ben is going out with, lets call her Emma and they have been together about 5 months although went on a 'break' for approx 2 weeks which happened to be the 2 weeks he went away on holiday to lets say miami. During his 2 week break nothing happened with anyone and when he got back they missed each other so much they got back together...cute. I have met Emma a few times and really like her plus we get on well which is strange usually his girlfriends hate me! So heres the problem - Last night Ben decided to tell me that since he has been back with Emma he has slep with someone else and got a bit frisky with a second girl both who know he has a girlfriend, Aren't girls bi*ches?! He has said he doesn't feel guilty at all and wants to be with Emma but how can he? I said he just want to have his cake and eat it but he just sees it as having fun! The problem really arises for the fact that Emma does the same gym class as me and so I see her twice a week at least and I feel so bad knowing that Ben has slept with someone else because she is such a nice person and if she found out she would be heart broken! Its not my place to say anything I've known Ben all my life and so I'm loyal to him but how can I put this out my mind...I cant even look her in the eye...help???

[nat_84]

hmmm....tricky....

I think you should tell Ben to get his act together and i think he's a bit out of order telling you, putting you in this awkward situation with Emma.

Tell him that you dont wanna know about any of his future "lady friends".

As for the present situation, i think you've made it clear that you're closer to Ben than Emma so i guess you're just gonna have to live with the situation until Emma realises herself what a toe-rag he is (maybe you could drop little hints - but you dont want her to think that you're trying to get in between them for your sake!).

[4getmenot]

Eherm aren�t girls bitches!!! What about her boyfriend!!! Anyway after that rant best thing to do is stay out of it, she will soon realise what he�s like, although the can we have a 2 week break while I go on hols would have done it for me. He sounds like the biggest loser ever. He needs to grow up before he loses this �emma� and realises what he lost.

[Scarlett]

He is not mature enough yet to have a real relationship. He clearly wants to sow his oats. You should tell him that he has put you in a difficult and horrible position, since you have to see Emma, and you like her. For now you will just have to deny all knowledge should she find out- after all, its just a secret you have to keep. But I would encourage Ben to do the grown up thing and finish with Emma in order to get it out of his system, OR stay with her and give up these other girsl. Either way, he needs to make a decision.

[4getmenot]

or wisk Emma away :-)

[Octavius]

What do you do when you have two friends in a relationship and you know that one of them is cheating? All the other facts are irrelevant you have three options:

1. Ignore it and let them work it out between them (you might lose a friend)
2. Tell the one who is being cheated on (lose two friends)
3. Tell the cheater that they should stop cheating before it is too late, come clean, or make a break (possibly lose a friend)

Which one you take is up to you, but whichever you decide remember that you are not the one causing the hurt - that would be Ben, but you may lose a friend either way. Emma although may not be innocent herself � she wouldn�t confide in you obviously � deserves better.