ChatterBank2 mins ago
Marriage proposals
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just listening to the radio and they are discussing men asking permission from their future father-in-laws to marry their daughter.
How many of you blokes did this and do you consider it to be outdated?
How many of you blokes did this and do you consider it to be outdated?
Answers
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I certainly didn't ask my father-in-law's permission, as it wasn't his place to permit or deny his daughter to marry.
This wasn't a reflection of a lack of respect for the man, however. He's a thoroughly splendid chap and I was therefore pleased that he was happy that I'd proposed to his daughter. No more than I was that my future mother-in-law was also happy though.
I won't expect to be asked if anyone ever decided to propose to my daughter either. (However, this is quite unlikely, as she's not going to be allowed to date until she's 40...)
This wasn't a reflection of a lack of respect for the man, however. He's a thoroughly splendid chap and I was therefore pleased that he was happy that I'd proposed to his daughter. No more than I was that my future mother-in-law was also happy though.
I won't expect to be asked if anyone ever decided to propose to my daughter either. (However, this is quite unlikely, as she's not going to be allowed to date until she's 40...)
I don't think i'm bothered either way, it's not my dads decision who i marry & him & my mum have never been my bf's biggest fans! If my dad said no, i would still marry him.
I know it's a nice gesture but i do think it's a bit old fashioned so wouldn't be bothered either way, i don't think my family would mind either.
I know it's a nice gesture but i do think it's a bit old fashioned so wouldn't be bothered either way, i don't think my family would mind either.
Interesting point octavius, do people still expect the brides father to foot the bill even in part. If I mentioned that to my dad he would laugh me out of the house!
My personal opinion is that it is outdated, I am a grown up, who owns their own home (mortgage obviously), has supported themself for over twenty years, is allowed to vote, and have a library card. My fathers consent is not in the equation as far as I am concerned. Also mrwarpig would never have been able to ask him, not from a hospital bed after I had finished with him if he considered it.
My personal opinion is that it is outdated, I am a grown up, who owns their own home (mortgage obviously), has supported themself for over twenty years, is allowed to vote, and have a library card. My fathers consent is not in the equation as far as I am concerned. Also mrwarpig would never have been able to ask him, not from a hospital bed after I had finished with him if he considered it.
My husband asked my Dad's permission. My Dad was dying of cancer and they had a good heart to heart about it. My Dad told him to look after me, our baby (I was 3 months pregnant at the time) my Mum & sister. I'd say he's stuck to his word very well :o)
To be honest I don't think my Dad would have minded if my husband hadn't have asked him but it gave them a chance to talk about what was going to happen after he had gone.
Glad to see you back 4getmenot :o) <Waving>
To be honest I don't think my Dad would have minded if my husband hadn't have asked him but it gave them a chance to talk about what was going to happen after he had gone.
Glad to see you back 4getmenot :o) <Waving>
Mr Nutgone asked my dad, and has been held in high esteem since then for going about things the 'proper' way. But then, my dad is quite old-school about things. Even so, it meant the world to him to be asked. It's a gesture, isn't it?! (He'd never have said no anyway!)
Personally, I thought it was fantastic - it meant the world to me too, and I'm not ancient.
ALLO - well done you! Proper 21st century woman ;o)
Personally, I thought it was fantastic - it meant the world to me too, and I'm not ancient.
ALLO - well done you! Proper 21st century woman ;o)
i would actually be quite annoyed if my future hubby did this, especially behind my back.
one, because it may mean he has a few old fashioned attitudes to women and their roles that i hadn't seen before, and would concern me.
i cannot stand all that ''traditional roles'' and ''men are the boss'' crap, and will absolutely not have it in my marriage.
two, my dads consent is irrelevant
three, my dad is a control freak and it would make him think he had some sort of say in the matter - he would not see it as the gesture it is meant to be - he would probably get all macho, and start giving a load of rules and orders etc, and get on his high horse, i am 34 and he still thinks he is the boss.
one, because it may mean he has a few old fashioned attitudes to women and their roles that i hadn't seen before, and would concern me.
i cannot stand all that ''traditional roles'' and ''men are the boss'' crap, and will absolutely not have it in my marriage.
two, my dads consent is irrelevant
three, my dad is a control freak and it would make him think he had some sort of say in the matter - he would not see it as the gesture it is meant to be - he would probably get all macho, and start giving a load of rules and orders etc, and get on his high horse, i am 34 and he still thinks he is the boss.
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