F'n Men

[JDB1971]

I have a friend (with benefits) we are both involved with other people and I told him i couldn't see him anymore because i was falling in love with him. He kind of freaked out and now won't even talk to me. WHAT THE HELL?

[JDB1971]

Let me clarify - it isn't that I don't want a relationship. I CAN'T. It is a bit more complicated than it looks. Before we "crossed the line" we were friends for more than 9 yrs! We always could talk about anything and now not at all. Come on, give me a break. He knows I can't leave my current situation and he does not expect me to so why the silent treatment?

[jno]

you've changed the rules; so has he. Why he has done so in this particular fashion I don't know (you know him better than me... er, unless I'm married to him) but triggerhippy is right: you acted, he reacted. Broadly speaking, I'd say he doesn't want you loving him. Maybe it's because he loves you too but quite possibly nothing of the sort; maybe he just thinks that because you told him you couldn't see him anymore, you'd dumped him?.

[JDB1971]

I guess. He drives me nuts - Thanks for the input. I don't know how he feels about me! ******. Haha
But we tried this before - he told me a few months ago that we had to step back to just "freinds" - it didn't last. Maybe because I pulled the trigger this time he didn't like it.

[sleepy1]

he prob freakout coz you said the love word . he prob only wants you for sex and was hoping it stayed that way but he is worried now you are falling for him and he might not want you that way good luck xx

[JDB1971]

Could be. I am trying to just ignore it all now. Move on. But the friendship we had was great. And the past year the sex was too. Why things come on along in life at times when they are not possible beyond a certain point I don't know. I guess that is what life and memories are made of.

[JDB1971]

I had a bit of communication with my friend just after i posted my last response. We both know that our relationship isn't right and have agreed we can't really even speak to each other but every once in a while. It was the reaction I needed and he too, I believe. I feel things are better now and we can both sleep more peacefully.