Still dont know what to do

[ChurchPunk02]

Hey, Some of you might rember I posted about me being 20 and falling for a 16 year old, well I talked to her and we decided it would be better to wait and see what happens. I can live with that. But my delima is now my friends have been trying to hook me up with another girl one my age. While she is really cool and cute and alot of fun to be around. Iam getting feelings for her but I cant take my mind off the other girl the 16 year old. I dont know what to do. Alot can happen in 3 years she could find someone else and Im worried that if she does the cool girl that my friends have for me will move on to.

[Doolallygirl]

Depends on how much you like this 16yr old. If you like her that much why haven't you already told your friends about her? Are you embarrassed? In which case what would you feel like if you did start seeing her and your mates found out. Sounds to me like you don't like this girl as much as you think you do. I know when I fancy someone I tell all and sundry about it, in fact I bore them silly for weeks! Maybe you should either tell your friends that you aren't interested in this cool girl because you have your eye on someone else and tell them all about her or if you don't feel you could do that then I think you should give this other girl a chance because it is important that your friends get on with your partner (in my eyes anyway) and obviously they like this cool girl too.

[woofgang]

di you and the 16 yo agree not to see anyone in the meantime??

[gerry]

Why have you waited to see what happens?.At the end of the day there is always going to be this 4 year age gap.Do both of u feel the same about each other?.As for this other girl you should only go out with her as long as you really want to,you shouldn't go out with her for the hell of it because you can't go out with the 16 year old just now.For example if you started seeing this girl & the releationship is going well & a few months down the line the 16 year old wanted to start seeing you, would you end the relationship that your in just now?.The last thing you want to do is play with anyones feelings.I've had it done to me & it's not a nice thing.Plus if it's alrite for you to start seeing somebody then surely it's ok for the 16 year old to start seeing somebody also.

[miss]

when i was 16 my bf was 20. we are now not together he is 24 and seeing a 16year old.. age doesnt even matter

[ChurchPunk02]

Doolallygirl yes I have told my friend about the 16 year old girl, they dont like it. They think I will just end up getting myself into trouble with her that is why they sent my on this blind date. The reason we dicided to wait is becasue he Dad wasnt to happy about a 20 year old dateing his daughter. I respect that so we are gonna wait till she is older and see what happens.

[Lurker]

I don't think you sound ready to tie yourself to one particular person at the moment. Why don't you just have a good time being 20. Plenty of time to have a steady relationship. It may be that your 16 year old will be the one - maybe not. Enjoy your relationship with the other girl - you don't have to commit.

[gemagination]

ok i know all of this stuff is really hard and the inspection of feelings never really tells you the right thing to do, but i would say that it is great that both you and the 16 year old are respecting her father and there is never any harm in just being friends. however, i do not think that you should go out with this other girl she does sound wicked but just because you want to be in a relationship with the 16 year old (and can't be) does not mean that you should be looking around for a sarrogate relationship, that is well harsh on the cool girl. and i am very inclined to go with fakeplastic's view on things, why worry about relationships now, your only young once and there are so many wicked people out there to have a good time with. enjoy it. also your talking about waiting three years, that's almost a thousand days, with every single one of them bringing with it new experiences and fresh faces.

[secretspirit]

I hope you're not expecting the 16 year old to sit round waiting for you while you see other people! That would be very unfair.