how do you decide ?

[legend758duo]

how do you decide if youre going out with someone?
is it a spoken word thing?
like asking them out ?
do you decide to sleep with them , IF youre going out with them ?
Or do you sleep with them , then decide wether you wanna go out with them ?
maybe im old fashioned?
tell me plz

[Goodsoulette]

I had been seeing someone for 8 months, I wouldn't have said we were an "item". if I had found he had dated around seeing me (like I have done) I wouldn't have been upset. I know he wanted more but he never had the balls to ask me for a proper relationship so he never got it.

[Sasha13]

That's what I want to know - it's so confusing!!!!

When I was at high school it was so easy - the guy said 'will you go out with me', the girl said 'yes' and that was it!

Now, it seems to me (28 yrs old), that if a girl asks if it's exclusive a guy thinks they're getting heavy and runs a mile. If they don't, the guy thinks they have free rein to see/sleep with other people under the pretence 'I didn't realise it was exclusive'.

I know it doens't answer your question legend, but it's kind of what I was getting at with my qu in r+d so I'll keep a close eye on your answers.

In short - I don't know! Experience has told me to assume partners are seeing other people unless a conversation about exclusivity has taken place, which then makes me wary to sleep around.

[legend758duo]

so in short youre more of a sex girl than a relationship one?
when the mood takes you so to speak ??

or did i read that wrong ?

[RATTER15]

In my day, if you took a girl out on a date and then you met up again and maybe got a kiss you would have been seen as a couple.

[legend758duo]

sasha what do you prefer tho?
exclusivity or variety ?

dont always put it back to the guy.

you know if a womans not up for it it dont happen .

and dont turn this into a forcing sex thread.

that aside the womans always in control.

so sasha ??

[4getmenot]

I think you just know. If you meet the right one its never a case of sitting down and asking eachother out

[RATTER15]

If I am intimate with a woman in any way and that means kissing (not a peck on the cheek) I wouldn't expect her to be doing the same with another guy!!

GROSS!!!

[legend758duo]

so youd have sex regularly knowing you were a couple?

unless told otherwise?

seems a bit presumptious to me .

but hey 21st century .



i know ratter now you gotta be having regular sex to be an item

[legend758duo]

quite right ratter


but as you see from the posts women are a bit different nowadays



i think the word might be EASIER correct me if im wrong plz.

[4getmenot]

thats what I said in sashas question in relationship section. Yer theres one night stands but then if you're seeing someone and having sex I would never sleep with anyone else. I wouldnt want it being done to me.

[Sasha13]

I 'm a 'prefer to know where I stand' girl

I'm not turning it into a forcing sex thread at all.

If I've been seeing a guy for a while and feel that I know him, I may sleep with him without a conversation having taken place.

[RATTER15]

lol Sasha, so you sleep with these guys before having a conversation with them!!

[4getmenot]

ha ha ratter

[Sasha13]

Ha ha - I didn't mean it like that!!

[bigmamma]

Ha Sasha , a little less conversation , more action please
lol :-)

[Reverandfunk]

Burger me Soulette 8 months and not an item lol

[legend758duo]

goody and i thought you was a raving nymphette too