Will I ever get over this?

[Kleiber]

It's two years tomorrow since my lovely husband died (he was only 47). Some days, I'm fine - normal, happy self - but others, I'm so down in the depths of despair. I don't really know how to explain, but I still feel as if a great chunk has been taken out of me - I miss him so much. Before he died, he told me I was strong and would be OK and most of the time I am, our son and I carry on with life as normal, but every now and again, it hits me. Part of me just can't believe he's gone. We had such a great time together and I don't think I'll ever meet anyone who could hold a candle to him. Has anyone else been through this? How have you coped? How long does it take to come to terms with the loss of someone who meant so much to you? I feel he's still with us but I look for him and he's not there.
I'm sorry to pour my heart out like this and I know a lot of you are going through bad times at the moment, but I need some support right now. Tomorrow, I'll go to our favourite place, up on the mountain and I'll talk to him and then I'll go and put some roses on his grave. And then I'll come home to an empty house. I just feel so damn lost.

[Kleiber]

Thank you, all of you, for the lovely messages, the poem and e-mail ads (I'll send you some tomorrow - I'm going to bed soon!). If I could give more than 3 stars, I would.
Wendy, reading your reply reminded me of a song which was a favourite of ours - "The Dance" by Garth Brooks - have you heard it? It echoes your thoughts so well, and I agree. All you guys have really helped me today and I'll be eternally grateful. Love, K xx Goodnight & sleep well, my friends!

[Ethel]

:) Glad you're didderling along okay.

[Kleiber]

Thanks, Ethel :0)

[B00]

night night Kleiber- sleep well :-)
xxxx

[Kleiber]

Night, night, mate!

[Louisa 69]

Hi Kleiber
I've just read through your post . My heart goes out to both of you. Grief is a terrible emotion to bear. I used to find taking it one day at a time helped me. Only move on when you feel your ready to and never feel guilty for grieving. Everybody deals with it in their own way and in their own time. Take care Kleiber i'm thinking of you both.

[slinkycat]

Hi Kleiber
My heart went out to you when I read this, as you know I'm a new member, and you have made me feel very welcome, I admit I have no constructive advice, just wanted you to know I'm thinking about you. Climb that mountain with your son, shout out about the injustice of it all, and try to find solace in each other and your friends. Wishing you all the best
Slinky

[stressing1]

I found this poem when I lost my son.
It helped me, hope it helps you.

Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die.

[bigmamma]

Kleiber love , I missed this thread as I don't very often look on this section .I am sorry to be so late offering any comforting words . After all these lovely heartfelt replies there's nothing I can really add other than to say your feelings are natural and you can move on at your own rate .2 years is a short while ago really and your heart will still be heavy. Bless you , (( HUGS )) xxx

[Kleiber]

Again, thanks so much, everyone. I really don't know what to say - there are so many really kind people on here. I only hope that if any of you are feeling a bit down any time, I can help you as much as you've all helped me.
Kind words and "cyber hugs" are always appreciated!!
I've got over Thursday now and am looking forward to starting a new job in October - that'll get me out again & I'll have my days occupied, so save me thinking too much!
It's only certain days I feel bad - you know, I'm sure : birthdays, wedding anniversary, Christmas. But I'm getting there...slowly, ok, but I am. Love & hugs to you all, K xxx

[lindapinda]

Just saw this thread tonight Kleiber.I wanted to pass on my best wishes to you,cos,you're such a nice lady and a real decent person on here ;-) Never worry about crying about your husband at any time now or 20 years from now,it's not going backwards,it's just how you feel about him when you miss him. I know you and young k will do fine xx

[Kleiber]

Thanks, lindapinda, that's really sweet of you. I'm not too bad now - I'll keep going - I've got a lot of other lives depending on me and to be honest, it's them that's kept me sane!! K xxx