What to do

[Cola bear]

Was going out with this guy for 31/2 years. Broke up 6 months ago (his fault). Now he wants to get back together says he can't live without me. Even declared his undying love for me on Sunday. Is it too little too late or should I give him another chance.

[Miss Random]

Hi Cola,
Three and a half years is a long time.

When you say it was his fault, was it one incident or an accumulation of events.

Sometimes, when you go back because you miss someone the reasons for splitting become very apparent.

What do you want to do?

Missy
x

[Cola bear]

It was an accumalation of things, but the most hurtful thing was that he said he didn't want to call on my birthday as "the traffic was too heavy". We live about 20 mins walk from each other and it was May so it wasn't even cold. He then threw my card in the letter box the following morning with a note on the front saying do what you want with this

[Katie7]

Sounds like you know in your own heart that you can do a lot better than him. If he's treating you like this now especially on your special day then it's time to find someone who values you as much as you value them.

[Petal~flower]

hi Cola, sounds like he has had 6 months to think about this. Probably found life as a singleton not as much fun as he thought it would be.

I agree with Katie. You deserve a lot better.

I personally think if you were to get back with him, he would end up treating you the same. So save yourself all the heartbreak. And carry on as you are.

Good luck x

[jno]

I'd be looking for some evidence that he'd changed before I'd have him back. People do change sometimes, so it's not a lost cause. Why not ask him to write down, maybe in a letter, the things he did wrong and an explanation - you will then be able to see whether he actually knows what he did wrong. If he does, there's hope.

[beso]

All to often when a person wants back in a relationship it is because they left when they had another interest that didn't pan out like they hoped.

While he cannot have you he may do extraordinary things to convince you and himself that he really does lovesyou. But once you take him back he will again take you for granted.

Do not be the girl he wants when he can't get someone else or you will always play that roll while he plays the field.

This man does not love you.

[123everton]

As a man I find giving cards a real chore. But I understand how important it is to you ladies. It seems like a little thing but it does add up to alot, if he could'nt be arsed then, then he won't be arsed in a few years time. I'd say skip this one, he's a T I T

[BugsyMalone]

Well...3 and a half years is along time to be in a relationship and to be frank you must have been through a hell of a lot together at least experience wise...i assume u may have had little "breaks" here and there and have always got back down to it.

In order for it to finally finish after all that there was obviously a good enough reason the same reason you should consider and think i shouldnt go back because of. No one really completely changes and dont settle for second best you'll always end up at square one.

[BugsyMalone]

Look at the long term effects..