Daughter growing up

[Desperado]

My daughter met a lad before Xmas. She's never shown interest in lads until now. I could have rung his scrawny neck. Sat there watching him hold her hand, touch her arm and all that. Even his politeness got my goat lol. How do other parents feel about letting their kids start dating??

[annie0000]

My boys are only 7 and 6 and I already think that none of the girls they play with are good enough for them, so god knows what I will be like when they start bringing them home or going out on dates!!!


How old is your daughter?

I guess that it is an adjustment that we all have to make, maybe you just have to not look! I am guessing from your post that he is actually a very nice young man and that it is not him specifically that you have the problem with. Just try to visualise her with a completely obnoxious rude ugly scruffy teenager and then open your eyes and count your blessings.

[andy-hughes]

As a dad with three daughters, I understand how you feel.

You have spent all your time and energy from the year dot until now nurturing your litttle girl, and you have been god-on-earth to her. She has poured all her love and affection into you - with a degree of wrapping-around-the-little-finger - and now, suddenly, all that attention is diverted away from you to some spotty oik wh odesn't even shave yet!

Fear not, it's part of fatherhood. What you have do do is bite your lip,, and never let her see that this new stage of her journey to womanhood is upsetting you.

You will find plenty of times when she is still your 'little girl' - my daughters are 32, 31, and 19, and i still get the 'can you help me?' look or phone call from them!

Once your daughter has got the hang of boyfriends, your relationship with her will stabilise into a much deeper and more meaningful set-up - adult to adult. You can;t be her mate, her best friend, or her boyfriend, but you can be her dad - and she only gets one, and you are it. It;s a relationship that will endure abd deepen as the years go on, so get past this bit, and the rest will be fine.

[Ice.Maiden]

Bless. Everyone has to start somewhere - YOU did! If this boy is your daughter's first crush, then I doubt it'll be the last. Try to bite your lip and don't be critical, because your daughter'd feel as though you don't trust her judgement. Obviously if the guy was an out and out chav-like thug, then you could ban him from your home, but your daughter feels comfortable in having the boy in her - and your - company, so relax about it, and try to talk to this young person. You may even realise what it is about him that your daughter likes so much!

[nutgoneflake]

My only little bit of advice is always make any boyfriend feel welcome in your house - even any you hate on sight. If she knows they're allowed, albeit with your teeth silently gritted!, you'll make the undesirables less 'forbidden' and therefore less attractive.

I've got two sisters, and one had the most awful boyfriend. She sneaked off to see him all the time, left the house early to 'walk to school with Sarah' and called round to his, bunked off school, everything. There were loads of lies, arguments etc, but as soon as my mum capitulated and let him come round for meals etc, the whole thing fizzled out. The element of rebellion had gone out of it, and he was suddenly old news. My mum had even started to get on with him too. Instantly uncool!!

Don't ban anyone from your house. You'll always know where your precious girl is, and who she's with, and you can't put any price on that. xxx

[Desperado]

The lad's ok, it's me being over protective. My 2 sons can date who they want you see, but my daughter's different. She's still my little girl.

Thanks for the advice. Appreciate it.

[123666]

sounds like he is up to no good ,probably creeping with politeness, before you know it you will be a grandparent!! i speak from experience i have two girls and two granddaughters , just whatch him like a hawk,!! good luck

[{Dakota}]

I remember my first boyfriend, his nme was Scott, I'm not sure how old I was, but it was around the time that "The Neverending Story" had just been released on VHS.

The reason I remember this is because I invited Scott to watch the movie my parents had rented at my house. Scott was exactly how your daughters love interest was acting - touching my arm etc. My parents wre watching the movie with us and I could see them passing looks of high amusement between one another.

After Scott left, my parents proceeded to tease me about it for (what felt like) ages. I didn't take another man home to 'meet the parents' until I was 19.

So there IS a way around it! LOL

[Desperado]

123666 worst nightmare eh?? Can't even think of her pregnant yet. My little girl.

Dakota & Scott rolls off the tongue. lol You've got a good point. Teasing her is something she'd hate. He did have weird hair, bit skinny, and swear she was taller than him. lol