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Putting your foot in it

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Caribeing | 19:27 Tue 22nd Jan 2008 | ChatterBank
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Recently met a friend carrying a suit asked him was he going somewhere nice, he replied
to my mother in laws funeral {genuine}
Have you ever "put your foot in it"
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Oh God! That happened to me last week at work. This girl who always wears jeans and baggy jumpers was really dressed up and I (idiot that I am) made a sarky comment. She'd been at a funeral. Oh well, not my fault that she's usually dead scruffy when the rest of us all wear suits to work, I guess!
Mortifying moment....
I was in my best friend's shop, and one of his friends whom I knew to be pregnant came in to say hi. I didn't know her well, so to break the ice, I went "Ooooh he told me about the baby, when is it due?".
Then she went "I had him two weeks ago".
Argh.
When really busy at work, a girl in another office called me and asked for some documentation to be taken to her. I asked if she could come and get it herself and she said no. So I muttered a bit and got on to it.

Soon a colleague of hers arrived to let me know that obviously no one had told me she was disabled. She would transfer to an office chair and her wheelchair would be put away for her so I didn't know.

I went over and had a chat and she said she was really concerned that I would feel awful and was cross that my office had failed to tell me.

A friend of mine was out shopping down town and managed to bump into a work colleague, she said jokingly youre a bit old to be shopping with yer mum, he said thats not my mum , thats my wife ..oooppss!!!
I made a similar gaff,max, i was shopping in dorothy perkins, Iasked the assistant when her baby was due, Im not pregnant she replied, i was hoping the ground would swallow me up, she looked about 7 months.
this is one that happened to me many years

at work, we had a party with our resident DJ. He was ok but very cheesey lol

well i asked for him to play the song "don't worry" by Mel and kim cause i loved it at the time!
When he put it on he said" here is a track especially for Julie, , Its called dont worry by mel and kim, and then he said "dont worry julie, you can always have an abortion"
he thought it was funny but what he didnt know was that 2 weeks previously, i had suffered a miscarriage!!! whoops! lol
the faces on my workmates were a picure! Have to say, im not the sort that would go funny about something said innocently though so it wasnt a problem.

That is why I NEVER ever mention due dates now, or anything related to being pregnant with ANY woman, even if she appears to be pregnant. You just never know!!! To my defence, the girl in question was a very big girl to begin with, and I guess pregnancy (or lack of) is less obvious in that case. Still, very embarrassing moment! I haven't lived that one down yet...lol
Oh blimey, years ago one night when I had been out with my mates, one of my friends lived in a secluded village so her Dad would often come and pick her up late at night. We were stood out the front of my house waiting for him when a car pulled up and I said "Oh look your Gran's come along for the ride, aww that's nice" when she burst out laughing saying "That's my Mum!!!" I felt awful and still cringe when I think of it!
I went out for a walk at the weekend and saw a man bending over a dog which was lying on the grass. I hailed him and said Nice Doggy and he said ****** off I just shot the bast--d because he ate my wife. I felt a proper fool.
err that's a nice story Gormless!
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For my job I have to inspect commercial properties offices, shops and the like. Recently I went to an office run by the big issue, I called in and a chap greeted me, really scruffy , unshaven etc so to make small talk I went on to say how great the big issue was for the homeless and he must be really pleased to be selling it etc...he then told me he was the office manager...opps!
I went to a health spa with some friends.When we got changed to go for a swim my mate told me to go and have a wee because "you know what youre like".I jokingly said "yes Mother".At that the woman next to us said to me "is she your Mum"?Again i joked "yes".The woman said "Yes,only a mother could boss you around like that".My mate went scarlet and walked off.Shes two years younger than me.Oops.
Oh dear, I just thought of a job-related cok-up..lol
I started my new job six months ago, and my new team leader was to be a guy I used to work with in a previous job, but he was off sick the day I started. So I went into the office, and my new colleagues mentionned the team leader, so I went "yeah, he was a bit wild at the time, I remember him having a really awful argument with his girlfriend at the time in the pub, he was sooo drunk!".
Turns out one of my colleagues is his new girlfriend. Ooopss!
Once out on a firm's do at a hotel, me and another girl who lived nearby offered me a lift home, as her boyfriend was coming to collect her. I accepted and waiting outside the hotel a lot of taxis and minicabs were coming and going.
After waiting ages a car screeched to a halt in in front of us.
I peeked in and turned to my friend and said "it's only another taxi driver" as he looked real old.
It only turned out to be her boyfriend!!!!
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Thanks for all great replies give you all 3star
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This happened to a friend,
He met his female neighbour who was often the worse for drink and she said she'd been talking to his wife she said "She's not very talkative is she?" he thought she said "She's not very attractive is she?" so he replied " Well you're no oil painting yourself!"

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Putting your foot in it

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