Ex Partner not paying Mortgage

[Upsey Daisy]

My Ex-Partner left the home 9 months ago and refuses to pay his half of the mortgage. He has left 3 children behind and pays no maintenence to them either. As the mortgage is joint the mortgage lender is hassling me for the payments as he keeps refusing to communicate with them. He however still wants half the money from the house which he never contributed to in the first place! How do I get help from someone with keeping up the mortgage payments?

[EverClean]

You MUST speak to the lender. It is NOT "his half" of the mortgage and they will never see it in this way. A mortgage contract contains the clause relating to "joint and several liability" which means that you are both jointly and separately liable for the mortgage debt and the monthly payments.

Explain the situation to the lender and ask them to help you come up with a payment plan. They can change your mortgage to interest-only, extend the term, make an arrangement with you to accept a lesser amount each month or in some cases freeze the interest. Get any decisions they make confirmed in writing.

You must NOT ignore the situation or think "It's OK - I've paid my half." It dosen't work like that.

If you don't feel confident enough to approach the bank or you feel you are not getting any help from them then speak to CAB. They have a free debt counselling service and may be able to approach the lender on your behalf.

In terms of the equity in the house - he will have all sorts of problems forcing you out while you have his dependants living there. I'm afraid that this sounds like you need to see a solicitor - ask CAB about this aswell. They will probably be able to find some free initial advice.

Good luck and don't let the b@st@rd grind you down.

[Whoever]

Shame him ! Write to his employer, explain that you and your 3 children have been deserted and ask if money can be diverted from his monthly salary to help you pay the mokrgage and meet your bills.

They undoubtedly won't do this, but if they call him in and let him know that they're aware of his behaviour, he might pull his socks up and send you some money, if only because he's worried his employer might think he's not a very reliable kind of person to be employing.

Of course you must speak to your mortgage lender first and see if they will give you some financial leeway or allow the mortgage term to be extended. And what are your relations like with your partner's parents? Surely they would be concerned about the well-being of their grandchildren? Would they be able to put pressure on their son to meet his financial obligations? It's worth a try.

And have you tried contacting the Child Support Agency? I know they don't have a good reputation, but you shouldn't leave any stone unturned if you've had no financial support from him for 9 months.

[Upsey Daisy]

thanks for your advise. I contacted CSA in August last year but as he keeps changing his job not mamanged to pin him down yet! They have written to his current employer twice already so I'm still waiting...
The mortgage company would be pretty helpful if he agreed to anything! As joint mortgage they won't do anything without his agreement! Of course, he wont even communicate with me about this & therefore no agreement can be made. He's hoping that the mortgage will go into arrears so that the house will be forced to be sold as his objective is to get the money out of the house (which I put in initially as he had no money!). It seems that he does not care that the children will be homeless if he forces this to happen! I have made the decision to force him into court asap to get this sorted as it seems the only option. Will cost me quite a bit but the sooner this is sorted the better.
He does not speak to his father (some family dispute years ago & his dad disowned him - could be down to the fact he does have a 13 year old son that he has never paid maitenence for who lives in France, his ex-wife is still trying to get the 10k that he owes out fo him!) His mother thinks the sun shines out of his a**e so no-go there for me to speak to - he could never do wrong!