Dumbest Questions You have been asked

[randyraven]

On holiday in the US a few years ago and trapped in a long lift journey with some Americans - Doing Hoover dam tour.

Them - you guys from England
Me - Yes
Them - It was sad about Diana.
Me - Who ?
Them - The death of Princess Diana
Me - Is she dead ? smile ....
Them - Yes ..did you now know
Me - No ...damn thats why I have not seen her car outside Harrods. Thats where we do our food shop
Them - oh

Them - Is it true you guys drive on the left
Me - Yes
Them - How do you cope with that
Me - .....My other half shut me up

[taichiperson]

Sons' friend:-
Is that a fire?
Yes
Do you burn wood on it?
Yes
How about coal?
Yes
My son visited him a week later - he also has an open fire!!

[4GS]

When I was on guard at Edinburgh Castle by an American tourist

Him:"What time does the one o clock gun go off"?

Me: Half past three

[shantra]

whilst pegging washing out have you done some washing then... upstairs neighbour

[randyraven]

4GS...

Why was it late that day ? lol

[VorVZakone]

Sitting with girlfriend in hotel cafe on visit to Glasgow, overlooking George Square.
American couple sitting beside us.
Me: You enjoying your holiday then?
Yank guy: Yes, we're doing a tour of Yourope, having a great time.
Me: Sounds great. How long you been here then?
Yank guy: One week
Me: where you going next?
Yank guy: Glasgow
(I look at girlfriend, who is smirking)
Me: Glasgow?
Me: What?
Me: Where do you think you are just now?
Yank guy: Why son, this is Dublin!

I nearly choked on my coffee.

He wasn't too bothered when I pointed things out.

[logic]

At airport check in.

has any body put anything in this luggage that you don't know about ?

[logic]

got on an elevator at hotel basement, a girl followed me on and asked ,are you going up?

[GEEMAC]

For an intelligent woman, my wife comes out with some belters, for example and just off the top of my head;

Her: What are those brown stains on the ceiling?

Me: Damp patches from where the shower has been leaking.

Her: What, the shower upstairs?

Needless to say we only have one shower.

[Psychick]

I have to say my boyfriend comes out with some good ones bless him!

We was ten pin bowling with some friends when he innocently asked how many pins there were.

When I was expecting our baby he asked how old the baby has to be before it can go in a car seat. I said how do you think babies come home from the hospital?

More recently I said the baby has a smelly bum. He asked how I knew. Umm...because I can smell it?

[randyraven]

On tube train many years ago ...

Yank tourist :- Can you help me find Baker Street
Me: Yes sure ...you need the bakerloo line
Yank: Whats line is that
Me: pointing to the map ...its the brown coloured line
Yank : what ones the brown one
Me: Are you colour blind
Yank: No

[logic]

duh, i just got that leggy,

[I Love Snow]

I work in a bus station.

Me - Hello can i help you
Girl - When is the next bus to glasgow
Me - Where are you travelling from
Girl - Ma grans
Me - Well where does your gran live
Girl - Am no telling you
Me - Well i can't give you the correct times until you tell me where she lives
Girl - (shouts back to her gran) The nosy bitch wants to know where you live
Gran - Tell her nothing
I gave up and told her that my crystal ball wasn't working that day.

[pastafreak]

LOL-please accept my apologies for the thick-headedness and ..umm..stupidity of some of my countrymen. The problem lies in having no-one but Dubya to look up to. As I said on another thread.....at least we/they provide laughs!!

[funnygirl]

Pmsl at some of these answers!!