4yr old wetting herself

[tigwig]

My daughter has just turned 4 and has started to wet herself. This started a few weeks ago where she was just doing a little bit in her pants which I thought was because she was leaving it too late but today she had just about done a full wee in her pants twice! I have tried not making a fuss, rewarding her for being dry and telling her off but she's still doing it. any suggestions?

[figure]

She's probably scared and nervous about something. I don't understand your last sentence - did you mean you told her off for doing it? Maybe you are making her nervous.

[ethanryan]

have u sat her down and asked if anything is wrong, has she alredy started school or will she start in september, maybe this could be playing on her mind. alot of people say they wet themselves when they are worried about something. it may be just that she is being a bit lazy but at the same time there maybe something going on in her head that she isnt telling. i would try having a bit of time just the two of her, reassuring her that she can tell u anything and that u wont be cross. i knew a child that wet himself and it turned out he was being bullied.
maybe it is just a funny stage sge is going through, hope u get to the bottom of the problem good luck x

[cazzz1975]

she may feel stressed because she wet herself, if you tell her off for doing it or punish her she will do it more, not to get at you but because of the stress she will feel under.

if you dont make an issue out of the mistakes she will forget them and probably stay dry more.

worth checking out if she is okay at nursery, sometimes a few incidents between kids can cause them a lot of worry and upset and wetting themselves can be how her worries manifest themselves

[abstibus]

Have you had her checked for a urinary infection?

[Goodsoulette]

I reckon tigwig left out the not, in not telling her off.

Annemollie has a good point about a urine infection, take a sample down to the docs.

My six year old wets the bed whenever he sees his Dad. He's never done it during the day though but there is a definite nervous reaction with wetting herself. Also young kids do just get preoccupied about with stuff and forget.

I also remember getting reprimanded for always needing the loo when I was younger. The result was me wetting myself in Sainsbury's to worried to ask!

[tigwig]

when I say 'tell her off' I don't mean I really shout at her I just tell her fairly crossly (if thats the right word!) that I do not want her to do that anymore. She has had a little trouble at nursery I suppose because her teachers kept telling me she wasn't talking enough to them so I ended up having a word with them about it which she knew about. I did reassure her she had done nothing wrong and she has never seemed upset about it but it does make me wonder. The other thing is that ever since she was potty trained 2 years ago she had always needed to wee alot and only smaller wees. She only has to have a drink and then needs a wee soon after. She is also still in nappies at night because she can't stop weeing in her sleep but the health visitor has said this is not a problem yet. Don't know if any of this is relevant

[Eve]

Maybe there's an issue with her speaking up when she needs to go for a wee.

I remember with horror wetting myself in front of the whole class on the first day of junior school as I was too shy to ask to go to the loo.

Can you get her into a toilet routine after having a drink, with the nursery's help.

Maybe if she's too shy to speak up at first she could indicate such as putting up her hand or standing by the door or taking something to one of the nursery staff.

[4getmenot]

snap jenna I did it in assembly because I didnt want to interupt it. And was given the biggest pair of blue gym knickers to wear the rest of the day

[tigwig]

she goes to the toilet no problem at school, she might have dribbled in her pants a bit but the children do not have to ask at all they just go. She seems to wet them more when she is with me.