potty trainin again

[kitten_uk2]

think ive wrote this topic a hundred times on here, my son is nearly four and ive been trying to potty train him for what seems forever. the nursery has agreed to take him in pants to help me out in getting him sorted before he starts big school, first day back from easter, he was in pants at home,and then to nursery in the afternoon, he didnt do anything tho i tried to get him to on potty and toliet. so warned them, if he didnt make it to the toilet there would be a puddle.... anyway i was at work in the evening so didnt get chance to see him before bed, but i looked in the wash basket and saw his wet clothes, i kno i shouldnt feel bad but my heart just sank, they were wet through, i kno he has to go through this but, im just getting so stressed with it all. today was the same hes done nothing at home so i know he will be changed when i pick him up. i feel im fighting a losing battle :(. theres no inkling that hes even catching on what im even saying to him, when he does wee at home its usually a few inches from his potty an he doesnt even realise what hes done.

[andrea81]

Is it a potty or toilet they use in nursery? sometimes sticking to same thing might help. Also my son was much better when he stared going t toilet with his father as a bit of a role model, he wanted to stand and point like daddy!

Also have you tried things like 'sink the battle ships (little floating paper to aim at and sink!)'. Or a target on the potty/toilet?

I sympathise with you I really do, it is such a stressful time, but I assure you it will all click together for you! x x x

[kitten_uk2]

the thing is i cant make him wee, i wish i could then we could play sinking ships ect, but i tell him to wee stood up/sat down whatever before we got to school and he just doesnt, hes watched his dad in the toliet so knows what to do and can mimic him by holding it etc. should i just stop again, because i really think he just isnt understanding what he has to do

[andrea81]

Have you considered seeking advice from doctors, he may have trouble controling is bladder? He may not 'feel' he needs a wee and when he does wee, he can't distinguish beftween havign a full or empty bladder!

Sorry if you have done all thesethings already x x x

[annie0000]

This will be a long reply, so be patient. This method even works with handicapped kids, so is very simple, this would maybe let you work out whether there was a medical problem or not.

What you need:

A whole day set aside - just one on one
A doll that pees (that you can control - you might need to stick blue tack over the hole!)
Potty or toilet
Plent of drinks
Plenty of treats - forget about healthy eating for a day!
Plenty of pants - make sure that they are easy to pull up and down - i.e maybe a couiple of sizes bigger than usual.
Plenty of patience
A warm house.

You need to choose a romm with no distraction, close to your toilet or potty and with a floor that you don't mind getting wet.

Dress your son in nothing else than a pair of large pants and a short t-shirt that doesn't come down below the top of his pants.
You need to prime the doll ready to pee and stick a pair of pants on the doll as well - start giving your son quite a lot to drink to make sure that he will need soon.

You need to explain to the doll about toilet training and that he/she must go to the toliet when she needs - pretend that the doll has asked to go to the toilet and take down its pants and make sure that your son can see it pee on the potty. When the doll has finished, give it loads of praise and a pretend treat. Ask your son if he needs to go - if he doesn't, just keep up a dialog about who would be really pleased if he used the toilet e.g Granny, Daddy etc. If he still doesn't need to go, repeat the show with the doll.
cont/

[annie0000]

If he does happen to use the potty/toilet, give him loads of praise and a couple of treats - keep up with the drinks as well.

Now, make the doll have an accident and wet her pants. Hopefully this will be before he has wet his own, if he does, follow the same as this but for him rather than the doll.

You need to make the doll wipe up the mess, and tell the dolly that not is not right, pee pees or whatever you call it, need to go in the toliet, explain to the dolly waht she needs to do again and show her a few times how to do it (the rules say 10 times, but I think that is a bit excessive). Change the dollys pants.

Have the dolly do t correctly for a reward a few more times - you could even pretent to phone Daddy or Granny to tell them that Dolly has done a pee in the toilet.

If you have kept up with his drinks, he should hopefully have either done a pee in the toilet, or wet himself by now allowing you to either praise and reward him, or have him shown again what to do.

Try not to ever get angry, you could tell him that you are dissapointed, but try to keep it that the only reason he hasn;t done it in the potty is because he hasn't understood and you have had to show him again.

Keep repeating, keep the drinks up and rewards until you are sure that he has really grasped it.

Dont allow any other distractions from showing dolly doing the toilet and him using the toilet until you are sure that he has done it a good few times - keep telling him how proud you are of him and how all his important people would be proud of him - make a point of really phoning Daddy or Granny if he actually does it.

cont/

[annie0000]

If you are fairly sure that he understands what he needs to do, gradually introduce distraction e.g. toys or tv. If he has an accident go through the process of having him help clear up and repeating the demonstration again of what he needs to do - again , I don't think 10 times is necessary, but I would do it at least 4.

Hopefully at this point - which may take all day - he will have grasped it and barring the odd accident, he should be on his way.

I hope this works for you - I trained my two boys this way at around age 3 and had them go from not using the toilet at all, to toilet trained in 4 hours - other than the very occasional accident, they never went back into pull ups - at least during the day!

Anyway, hopes this works for you and that I haven't missed anything!

Good Luck

Annie XX

[kitten_uk2]

thanx for your answers. i have to mention my son is not very good with speech, so i think this is a factor in the potty training. he didnt start walkin till he was 2. when his dad does a wee we make a big thing about it so he knows its a good thing. everyone says it will come in time. i just get impatiant with it all. with his 4th birthday coming up what mother wouldnt.

[kitten_uk2]

well i think we are getting there slowly, tuesday my son told me he wanted the toliet and so i took him and he did a wee for me, i nearly cried!!!!! and yestaday he told me he wanted to poo and after a couple of attempts he did one for me in the toliet. but today we are wet again. i think we are getting there but its gonna be a slow process

[kitten_uk2]

im not sure anyone still reads this, but i think(touch wood) we are finnally dry, my son has learned to wee stood up now, and after months of thinking he wouldnt do it ever, we have more dry days now than wet ones! nearly time to start his bedtime now! thanx for all your responses! xxxxx