ChatterBank5 mins ago
My housemate keeps borrowing stuff
13 Answers
My housemates are really generous and always say to me if I need to borrow any milk or anything they dont mind at all. I think this is really kind but being brought up the way I have been I don't like to rely on them and therefore will usually go up the 24 hr garage (10 min walk away) and buy some.
My housemate however seems to think my cupboard is the 24hr convenience shop. Now I don't mind lending things every now and again but this is constant. If its not baked beans it milk, if its not milk its bread, if its not bread its hair straighteners, if its not straighteners its bubble bath u get the picture.
Half the time she has got bread she just wants a fresh piece cus hers is in the freezer.
I feel slightly selfish (given how giving they are) but I just don't want people borrowing things constantly.
My housemate however seems to think my cupboard is the 24hr convenience shop. Now I don't mind lending things every now and again but this is constant. If its not baked beans it milk, if its not milk its bread, if its not bread its hair straighteners, if its not straighteners its bubble bath u get the picture.
Half the time she has got bread she just wants a fresh piece cus hers is in the freezer.
I feel slightly selfish (given how giving they are) but I just don't want people borrowing things constantly.
Answers
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Yes, but say it with a smile. Tell your housemates that you've changed your mind about lending any of the cupboard/fridge stuff, because you've noticed that everytime you go for something yourself, it's either gone right down - or gone completely. Then say: "Sorry guys, but it'll have to be each to their own from now on."
When you say they borrow things, do they replace these things or are they just taking them?
Perhaps a better way of dealing with things and not looking like a complete miser, is to tell them you are a bit financially hard up and suggest the household starts a kitty, to purchase things like bread, milk, baked beans, shower gel etc.
Given that they are both generous, then you may have to get used to sharing your hair straighteners. But make it clear on the things you will not share, like underwear or boyfriends.
Perhaps a better way of dealing with things and not looking like a complete miser, is to tell them you are a bit financially hard up and suggest the household starts a kitty, to purchase things like bread, milk, baked beans, shower gel etc.
Given that they are both generous, then you may have to get used to sharing your hair straighteners. But make it clear on the things you will not share, like underwear or boyfriends.
Why don't you suggest you all put some money in the kitty (I don't know how much would do it) say a fiver a week!!?? to buy staples such as milk bread butter etc.
You could also have a cupboard with things that are often used by all the housemates such as hairdryers, straighteners toasters etc with the previso that if anything is broken it has to be paid for.
Overall I don't think you are being unreasonable. It's just that other peoples bounderies are different to yours. If you don't say anything you will end up falling out as you will become more and more resentful.
If you start hiding your stuff they will either notice what you have done and who knows what they might think!! or just rummage through your stuff looking for what they need.
You could also have a cupboard with things that are often used by all the housemates such as hairdryers, straighteners toasters etc with the previso that if anything is broken it has to be paid for.
Overall I don't think you are being unreasonable. It's just that other peoples bounderies are different to yours. If you don't say anything you will end up falling out as you will become more and more resentful.
If you start hiding your stuff they will either notice what you have done and who knows what they might think!! or just rummage through your stuff looking for what they need.
Awww, karmgirl, this brings back horrible memories for me from last year when I lived with two of my friends. When we moved in initially they wanted to share the shopping bill, but I insisted that I wanted my own as they both earn a lot more than I do (so chuck any old thing in the trolley) and one of them drank like a fish.
One of the girls started off asking to "borrow" a bit of my milk, a slice of my bread, which I was fine with, but it got to the stage where I'd go to the fridge and have no milk left from two pints and it really started to get to me as she would never replace it. It felt really petty, but it was more that I needed to know that my food would be there when I expected it to be instead of me having to go without out.
And breathe! :) My best mate and I moved out not on the best terms with this girl, anyway for various reasons, but everything that bugged us all about each other came out in a screaming match on the last day as we loaded our cars. Funny looking back on it, anyway.
Don't not say anything, hun, or it could all come spilling out when there's a bit of butter missing... :)
One of the girls started off asking to "borrow" a bit of my milk, a slice of my bread, which I was fine with, but it got to the stage where I'd go to the fridge and have no milk left from two pints and it really started to get to me as she would never replace it. It felt really petty, but it was more that I needed to know that my food would be there when I expected it to be instead of me having to go without out.
And breathe! :) My best mate and I moved out not on the best terms with this girl, anyway for various reasons, but everything that bugged us all about each other came out in a screaming match on the last day as we loaded our cars. Funny looking back on it, anyway.
Don't not say anything, hun, or it could all come spilling out when there's a bit of butter missing... :)
lol whiskeysheri
How do I say she can't have it though? Like if she wants a slice of bread and she knows I've got bread?
IF I say no then I will look really selfish and there would appear to be no reason for me to say no.
we all buy our own shopping and use our own things like shampoo etc so she should just make sure she buys enough to last her and stop shopping at my cupboard
How do I say she can't have it though? Like if she wants a slice of bread and she knows I've got bread?
IF I say no then I will look really selfish and there would appear to be no reason for me to say no.
we all buy our own shopping and use our own things like shampoo etc so she should just make sure she buys enough to last her and stop shopping at my cupboard
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