Hi, I have had and suffered with depression all my life nearly. I have tried and taken many different drugs, tried therapy etc... and I am not cured but I never expected or expect to be tbh. I have accepted that this is me and I can cope with it now, whether that is from experience of getting older or the last medication I took I dont know. I do know I still have bad times and I fear that its getting worse but I always come out of the other side. I think you should really go see your doctor, tell them exactly how you feel and be honest - They will try to help you the best they can. Whether it be medication or therapy etc.. I hated and still hate the idea of medication but I got so bad there was no pther option, and I will be honest I had to try alot of drugs to find some theat didnt make me ill and that helped rather than hindered but it was worth it in the end. I think its different for everyone, some people have an idea why they are depressed others have not a clue. But even though I dont believe I will be cured I believe I am much better than I was - which is a start. You should really talk to somebody though just a to get some professional insight. Alot of us have been there and your not alone by any means. You can get better but you have to seek some advice first. The other advice I have is when your feeling really down, if you have no one to talk too why not post a question here - just havong a chat whether it be digital or not can help you feel a little better.Hope you manage to talk to your doc & I hope you start to feel better in yourself soon x