Home Alone??

[Alixypalixy]

I have a sensible mature 13 yr old daughter and a 6 yr old daughter, I have a second job in a bar but due to my ex keep changing his access days/nights i may be forced to end my evening job but this would mean i would also have to sell my house as i really need the extra income....... Does anyone know the legal age for my girls to be left alone while i work??? I would be out from 8pm till 12pm, my neighbors will pop in on them to check they are ok and i only work over the road. Is this exceptable and legal? Please Help?

[squarebear]

"...my neighbours will pop in on them to check they are ok..."

Isn't that what the McCanns said?

[naomi24]

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Yourchilds healthandsafety/Yourchildssafetyinthehome/DG_0 70594

[redcrx]

a mature and responsible 13 year old may be able to look after herslef for an hour or so but not late into the night. and to add a 6 year old to the mix I certainly wouldnt want to risk it

i dont know the legailities but i would think its unlikely to be thought of as safe

[obNOXious]

If your daughter is very sensible, has several neighbours/ trusted people's phone numbers etc, then i am actually sure that she will be fine. I know it's not PC to argue with the sheer hysteria about kids these days, but this is not a young child, this a young adult you are talking about and as long as there are sensible precatutions in place then I gravely doubt any harm will befall them. I'm in my 40's and in my generation it was common for baby sitters to be 13, it's only recently that the age for being a child seems to be creeping upwards in people's minds.

[know-ledge]

Who's at fault when the six year old falls down the stairs and breaks a leg or a similar accident?

your 13 year old for not watching her properly?

[naomi24]

Sorry, I posted the link, but I've just realised the times you'll be out. 8-12 at night. It's only my personal view, but I wouldn't consider leaving children at night - and you're obviously not comfortable with the idea. Can't you change your hours of work? If not, perhaps you could consider a job in a supermarket. They often offer flexible shifts.

[LoftyLottie]

It's true what Nox has said. I used to babysit my cousins at night when I was 13. It was considered acceptable in the 60's.

I think it does depend on the maturity of the child. However, I do not think it is responsible to leave a six your old in the charge of a 13 year old on a regular basis. It puts too much responsibility on the 13 year old who, however sensible they may be, might not be able cope in an emergency.

It is not illegal to leave a child at home alone, however, there are circumstances in which parents can be prosecuted.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/2603817.stm

[stonekicker]

so who's responsible if a parent is in the house and the six year ols falls down the stairs and breaks her leg. idiotic point! you would have to take into account the 13 year old (mature/sensible etc.) and the 6 year old (good/evil etc.) in question. either that or ask someone you trust with kids to babysit and you return the favour when you are at home if you can't afford to pay. or, third option - get another job. it would be better to do a cleaning job at 6am than it would to leave the kids late at night, for example. oh and tw@t your ex for being such a pain in the bum!

[Eve]

Looking at the times wouldn't that mean that they would both be in bed while you were out (or nearly so for the older one) or that the older one would have to stay up until you got home?

[aims1202]

When i was 13 i babysat for three kids 6yrs, 5yrs and 3yrs on a regular basis, this was in the 90's and surely it hasnt changed much since then? Never had any problems and i'm pretty sure i would have coped had there been an emergency. If you think your 13yr old is mature enough and your 6yr old is good with them then i dont see a problem with it. Daytime would be fine too but I think they are probably safer at night than in the day.

[frankofile]

I may be wrong, but in this country we have never legally set an age when a child is responsible, which in a way is right, as they all differ in levels of responsibility, so it all comes back down to the individual circumstance. Not much help, I know, but as others have said, years ago siblings looked after each other. trst your judgement.

[Alixypalixy]

Thanks to all who replied. I have taken on board your advice, however i would just like to point out that i am nothing like the Mcanns, in that i am not loaded (ie I can not afford a babysitter) and I am not leaving my kids whilst on the ****, i am actually working a full time job and a part time job just to stay in my childrens home. This is a difficult decision that i need to make and have full back up from 2 neighbours, who sometimes can stay all night but not on every occassion and when they can not stay at my house they are only next door with their own children. If there was any other job i could do that would be more suitable i would be doing it.

[NiceCupOfTea]

Have you been to a lawyer regarding the change in your circumstances due to your ex changing his terms? If you had a legal agreement and he has changed it to the detriment of you or your kids it needs reviewing in a court of law.

[newtron]

When I was 13, I babysat my 10 yr old brother and twin brothers who were one year old for up to 8 hours a day. Both of our parents worked full time. We didn't keep the house as clean as my parents probably wished, but we all survived.

[terambulan]

This is all due to ".......your ex keep changing is access days/night...." I'd kick your ex's butt into shape and give him access on ur terms or not at all. It shows he's unconcerned of ur daughters' welfare.

Maybe you can share baby-sitting with your neighbours to solve the problem.