What the ??

[Roughquest]

Hello, I had the shock of my life last night, anyone remember me seeing some total nutcase of a bloke last year, well he once told me he had only been married twice, UNTIL his 2nd son from a 3rd marriage turned up on my doorstep, in a real state, anyhow i asked him in, and we chatted for ages, he apologised for calling on me so coldly, but he wanted to ask about his dad, someone he has not got a chance to know, how do i deal with this ????? Its brought back all the hurt and pain and why would he have 'covered up' his very 1st marriage ???? I am so confused....

[4getmenot]

sorry can you just tell me, is his dad still about?

[~Wingnut~]

Hmmmm that is a toughy Roughquest!
How did he know where to find you?
Thing is you have no duty to anyone here but yourself, there is prob only so much you can tell his son anyway before your going round in circles so it may not be best for you to continue talking to his son if it has stirred up a lot of hurt and emotions.

As to why he covered up his first marriage? Only he knows why he did that! To be honest it can't have been for any good reasons can it? If I were you I would try to distance yourself from all of them before you get dragged back into the ex's life when he turns up wanting to know what you have said, why you told him this, that and the other etc..

No good can come from any of this, busy yourself so your not dwelling on him again and try not to understand why he did any of it as you will end up going crazy and will still be none the wiser.
You need to carry on as you were before the son turned up.

Good luck :o)

[Roughquest]

His dad has tried to get back with me on numerous occasions, and has been round my house to deliver the odd bit of post for me, his mystery son saw his car in my drive and around the area and thought he lived with me.
Is it a case of bigamy, or secret love child ??? LOL....It has knocked me for 6 this one....and how can someone so awful have really lovely kids ? It hurts...

[Roughquest]

He is hiding something, I text my ex to tell him and all i got back was "so its none of your business" - wonderful...guess it isnt my business...but his son just wants to see his dad...but his son is very very angry about it all...and asked ME why did i end up with his dad ?

[4getmenot]

It is not up to you to tell the son, if you know where he is give him address of his dad and wash your hands of him. This bloke just sounds like a git that cant take responsibility for anything and jumps from one marriage to the next not caring how much he may hurt anyone along the way.

[Roughquest]

The best bit is my ex's family know his 1st son very well! They didnt even tell me !! Which has made me very upset...my ex's brother i get on ok with...MEN!

[4getmenot]

maybe they thought it was up to him to tell you

[Roughquest]

When my ex's father died last year, i was 'kept away' from the funeral (some scenario cooked up by my ex to make them not want me there, bad mouthing me) - and the lad told me he attended !!!! Grrrrrr...........so my ex knew this and had to keep me away ??? This also hurts as I really liked his dad....

[4getmenot]

well you're shot of them now. move on

[cazzz1975]

its not your problem now, he is your ex