Dyspraxia / DCD - Developmental co-ordination disorder

[Meg888]

My 11 old daughter, has just been diagnosed with Dyspraxia, ADD (without the hyperactivity) and mild learning difficulties.

We've known for a long time there was something wrong, however, we assumed that she initially just needed 1-2-1 in school, however, as she's grown, her difficulties seem more apparant to that of her peers. She is statemented and receives SEN teaching in school which she has done now for 5 years; it's helped some, but she is way behind both in school and socially.

Some of my main concerns are that she always seems to see the negative side of a situ, she can appear unhappy, unwilling to join in fun or laughter or if she does, she often tends to "spoil" it for others by misbehaving or saying something upsetting. She is an only child and we have a stable home life. More often than not we stick to a routine, whereby, getting up/eating/school/bath etc occurs the same time most days. If we do something different she is always consulted and her opinion, as long as is reasonable, is taken on board. She has all the latest toys to play with, although very few friends, as she has difficulty making and maintaining friendships with her age group, with exception to my partners' children, all of who seem to have a great time when they're together.

She has just started high school, although it is too early to tell just yet how things are going, we've already had a couple of hiccups, by way of getting lost in the school, her lack of organisation and establishing friendships.
We are due to see Dr's again around Feb'09., and they talked briefly of medication; I'm not 100% sure if this was for DCD or ADD; would this help? I've noticed a lot on the web about dietary change, and wondered if this was worth considering, either also or alternatively.

I would appreciate any advice you could give or books you could reccommend, as she has had a tough time these last few years and I would love to

[cazzz1975]

my son has autism and he has difficulties in dealing with any social situations, he reacts similar to your daughter and has to cause trouble or misbehave. For my son his problem is that he has trouble dealing with excitement and cannot cope, most "happy" events like xmas morning or a party will make him very upset for the whole day.

making her a simple map of the school should be helpful to her until she learns her way around, she should have no pressure on her to make friends with anyone, this will just make her anxious. The only dietary changes I believe in is cutting out junk and artificial colours, they can cause hyperactivity and lack of attention.

My daughter has also just started secondary and has become very upset and fearful about getting lost or being late! she was also worried that she hasnt made loads of friends (as she feels everyone else has) does the school have a good level of support for statemented pupils?

Does she have difficulties in social situations? (not understanding expressions or having difficulties in talking to other children?)

.

she is bound to act up more because she is starting secondary school and there is a lot of new things to get used to especially if she is not with people she knows.

[Meg888]

Thanks cazzz for your reply; I know what you mean about happy events, my girl is the same, up until now I've struggled to understand what her problem was, though I've always been sympathetic, and then I am accused of giving her unnessecary attention or "keeping her young" (as she is quite immature compared with her age group). I was thinking of sitting down with my partner and his children and explaining the problem and working out together how best to support her. The hospital are contacting the school and making a referral to SENTASS, which I believe is support/advice for the SEN co-ordinator of the school., but I was thinking also of making an appointment to see them, as she is distributed homework which is the same as the others, and I basically do it for her! I've never explained to her that she has any sort of problem, as I didn't want her to feel different (she has a low opinion of herself anyway), but do you think I should? She can be quite dramatic, and I'm worried she'll either worry her self over it or, maybe even milk it to a degree as she is quite capable of this! What do you think?

Your advice is much appreciated, thank you.

[cazzz1975]

you need to ensure she gets the help that she needs, to a degree you have to get past the stigma of feeling different, she probably feels different anyway, what kind of provision is the school providing? by getting the hekp she will not feel like a failure and her self esteem will improve.

learning disabilities are no ones fault and she should not feel defective if she has one, I would imagine she feels it when she is in school and cannot do what everyone else does so easily. have a meeting with the school and discuss your fears, explain that she is having difficulties with the work, depending on the provision provided on her statement they should be able to address her problems.

it is paramount that this does not get ignored as she will almost probably develop behavioural problems in order to avoid working. dont do her homework for her, ask the school what they are doing to help her in respect of her statement of special needs

[queensferry]

my 11yr old son has dyspraxia and mild dyslexia,
starting high school is a big thing for any child but even more so for, a dyspraxic child because of their lack of organisational skills, you mentioned she was statemented,
have you had a meeting with the senco at her new school to discuss what help they will put in place for her and have they drawn up an I E P, all the teachers she has should be aware of her dufficulties and set the homework accordingly,
if this isn't the case then you need to contact the school and tell them she isn't coping with the homework,
regarding her not wanting to join in that is quite normal for a dyspraxic child because they suffer from low self esteem and will often avoid these situatuations because they get laughed at or teased, find out if the school runs sensory sessions they really do help
is there a Dyspraxia support group in your area, it may help your daughter to meet other children in the same situation,
and it would help you if you had someone who understands to talk to,
has she never questioned why she gets help in school?
my son was a completely different child when he was diagnosed it made him feel better about himself he understood why he couldn't tie his shoe laces or throw and catch properly but it hasn't stopped him learning the saxophone, the medication will be for the ADD, but all children with dyspraxia have a short attention span.
here a couple of books that might help
DEVELOPMENTAL DYSPRAXIA
BY MADELINE PORTWOOD,

HOW TO UNDERSTAND AND SUPPORT CHILDREN WITH DYSPRAXIA BY LOIS ADDY AND REBECCA BARNES

HELPING CHILDREN WITH DYSPRAXIA
BY MAUREEN BOON

if you want your daughter to know what her problems are
this might help
STEPHEN HARRIS IN TROUBLE A DYSPRAXIC DRAMA
BY TIM NICHOL