Christmas nightmare

[flowerholic]

For the first time in 7 years my entire family will be with me from all over the world and my partner has invited his 16 year old daughter. After all the lying, stealing, being in trouble with the police for being drunk and getting into fights and showing my daughter who is 4 years younger porn, I haven't had her here for the past year. He can go and see her whenever he wants but I don't want to be involved any more. We discussed Christmas and I told him I couldn't have her here but he has invited her anyway. I haven't told my child yet as it will destroy her much longed for Christmas. At the moment nobody is talking to anybody else...any suggestions welcome...

[banjobabe]

Hey flower,

I do feel for you and also for the child. In my opinion it is usually the 'parent with care' who sorts out birthday cards etc. When my daughter lived with her father I rarely got a card on time, not because she didn't care but because her father did not give her money for it. At the end of the day the contact should be maintained by the parent not the child.

My son was horrific for a few years and I ended up kicking him out but as I say it's ok now!

Don't worry about what people say on here, mostly you will get decent answers as sensible people know that you cannot tell the whole story as there is just not enough time or space!

I have been accused of all sorts but only by very shallow people! I know my own situation inside out but it is very difficult when people don't know all the facts so they tend to assume an awful lot.

I hope it all goes well for you.

Bb xx