when couples split

[bubbles4920]

when a couple you know has split up/divorced have you been able to maintain a relationship with then separately, particularly if one of them has cheated on the other? maybe you see that the cheating one did it for his/her own good reasons etc

[Suzyboo]

Please share what you consider to be good reasons for cheating

[sara3]

good answer!

if there are kids involved, you need to make an effort for their sakes.

[bubbles4920]

i meant if joint friends thought they could still be friends with both but separately, as in they saw that one wasnt happy with the other, thought even though they cheated they were now happier, im just wanting to know if anyone as i say can remain friends with both parties after a split. im about to announce to our joint friends that my hubby has cheated and wonder how they would react to him, stay friends with him maybe but still meet up for drinks etc separately. anyone done this, is this possible? i obviously do not condone cheating but some may see it as good if a couple arent happy and it brings a relationship to a sad end but a happier future?

[bubbles4920]

anyone gone through this scenario?

[QueenOfAmber]

Seriously though, why?
Why would you want to be friends with a person who you've just broken up with/divorced from?
I've heard of this before and it rarely works...

[saxy_jag]

We are, sort of, although the couple involved were more close acquaintances than friends, as such.

Hubby was in a band with one of them and as a result we got to know her and her girlfriend quite well. Then they split up and we helped her to move to a new flat. However, we still think the world of the girlfriend too.

Each seems to accept that they can't ask us to take sides over their broken relationship, as it was nothing to do with us. As long as we don't turn every conversation to it and are thoughtful enough not to expect them to be in the same room, they're both OK with things.

[bubbles4920]

i think you have misread the question queen of amber

[phillipa.d]

Me an my ex were friends with a couple. Me and my ex split up in the January, the couple split up in the October just before. She had an affair, and it was her fault they split, but I have stayed friends with her, and my ex has stayed friends with him. It's not for me to judge the reasons she was unfaithful, no-one can know what goes on between a couple behind closed doors And we're still great mates. This was all five years ago.

Incidentally, I now cannot STAND her ex, because he was such an arse about it, and still is. I know he was wronged, but he has totally milked it, continues to give her grief daily, and has been such a wimp wallowing in self pity, refusing to see kids, reporting her to social services, turning her family against her, etc, etc, etc. Oh well!!