anyone ever sued for defamation of character

[Nosha123]

Not sure whether I will even commence proceedings or not - but interested if anyone knows if its a costly process or not.
We are building our own house - hubby is a builder. Neighbours are old and just moan all the time and have now started telling lies in the nearest town to shop owners about him being a cowboy builder etc.
They hired a legal advisor who eventually dropped them and sided with us and she told me she had found out what they have been saying about us and we should consider issuing a warning letter to them to stop spreading lies.
Has anyone ever done it before? Just curios as to what is involved and whether you won or not... (what do you win?? damages I assume but based on what??)

[PeasAndRice]

it depends on what style of spurs he wears....

[Nosha123]

Ha ha very funny!
Is Ethel around - she is usually very knowledgeable about these things!

[Ethel]

Totally pointless suing for defamation - they will claim it is fair comment.

Suing for defamation is horrendously expensive, and the damages is financial, so unless they are fabulously wealthy it is just not worth it.

A warning letter could be considered - but could exacerbate the situation

[Nosha123]

by the way - I could 'call' on their ex-legal advisor for a detailed statement as to what she heard from the coffee shop owner and I guess I could call on the coffee shop owner too to make a statement about what our neighbours said to him.

So I can get some witness evidence as to what has been said - one of whom is of impressive legal standing and so guess her statement would be taken as the truth.

I just want to STOP them in their tracks and make them think seriously about their actions! Am sick of their lies and the stories going round the neighbourhood that I keep hearing and then find out they are spreading lies in the town too!

[mrs_overall]

If suing isn't an option, why not fight fire with fire? Spread a few rumours of your own.

[Nosha123]

Hi Ethel... the neighbours have been warned by other neighbours that they need to be very careful what they go around saying or else they could get themselves into trouble.... I heard this from a neighbour... but wasnt sure what exactly they had been saying so not sure what her was alluding to by warning them to be careful.

Ultimately it could affect Hubby's business if word gets out he is a cowboy builder how is he going to get more work? (he isn't a cowboy builder I hasten to add.. he is a very good one!)

I will do the warning letter and get it sent maybe from our solicitors.

[Nosha123]

Hi Mrs Overall... I had thought about that... but part of me wants to maintain the upper hand - in that I would then be as bad as them.
He is very old and not of great health - but seems to be quite a bully (to his wife anyway) and can be quite nasty...

If they continue they are really going to wish they had never started with us...

[mrs_overall]

Nosha, if the oldies are as bad as you say, then they will be known for it and probably people will take what they say with a pinch of salt anyway.

I'm sure your house will be beautiful....and will speak for itself as an example of your husband's talents.

Have you tried to befriend them?

[Ethel]

What the ex-legal advisor heard from the coffee shop is hearsay, so is worthless.
I doubt the coffee shop owner would want to get involved or the neighbour, for that matter, but you could ask them if they'd be prepared to make statements about what these neighbours said to them.

Really though, I would ignore it. People are unlikely to take their word when it comes to a choice of builder, and you could make matters much worse.

[Nosha123]

we tried to be Oh SO Nice to start with... and would go round with small token gifts to apologise for any building noise or disruption etc... and then I have had to sit there listening to the old man say how I have ruined his life and that my Husband is a CLOWN and why on earth do we want to build the house anyway. He then tells me I am making now friends round her (not true! I have met some lovely neighbours!).
I now dont rise to him - or listen to him slag off my husband - who is nothing but hard working and honest (yes ... an honest builder! ha ha)
They hate cats - so we were thinking of getting another two kittens later this year!!!! ha then train them to go and sh** in their garden!

[Ethel]

Have you any idea how upsetting change is for people, especially old people, and how disruptive and noisy building work can be?

Just ignore them - they are not building experts, nor customers of yours, so people will take no notice

[Nosha123]

I totally understand that this process of work we have been doing has been upsetting them.. and totally sympathise - which is why for months we have been pandering to their every whimper.. but it has reached a point of complete ridiculousness... and they are saying things like we have de-valued their house by �100,000 etc etc blah blah...

Maybe instead of a warning letter - I will verbally let them know that I do not appreciate their comments and stories and that they need to stop or else they could get themselves into trouble. If they know that these stories are coming back to me and they are not 'getting away' with it then they might stop.
Either that or I'll pray for a cold snap of weather!!!

[mrs_overall]

If he's a bully then your confronting idea might work. He's probably used to getting away with it, as bullies do.
Good luck, and try not to let it get you down. xx

[Nosha123]

Thanks Ladies!!