Help !!!

[Furner]

In response to my last question 'god awful situation'. He has said right from the beginning of all of this that he wanted to sell the house and he did not want any of the things that we have collected over the years. He is putting loads of pressure on me to sell the house as quickly as possible. I suppose my BIG question is, ok I except that he wants out with no real reasons but what I cant except that he has switched off completely as though I have never existed, he wont talk at all except for being nasty..but how can he have no feelings just like that and become involved with someone else so quickly and easily and persist in torturing me with this new person in his life?? The guy has gone from being fantastic to a MONSTER overnight...please help!!

[MargeB]

For him, dealing with you means confronting the fact that he's just ignored someone else's feelings by cheating on them.

One solution, if you really want to keep him, is to try riding it out until he gets bored with her.

Or use 'black ops', find out who she is, and confront the bitxh.

[Mrs_Pegasus]

Move on Hun.

No point crying over spilt milk.  He has cheated, he wants to get on with his life regardless of how much he is hurting you.  Let him go.  Like someone else has said, keep focused and let him wait for the house to be sold.  You take as much time as you want.  Get a solicitor and secure your interest in the house and any other joint investments or liabilities. 

You can if you wish, ride it out and see if he comes back to you but the chances are he is unhappy with your relationship and the chances are he will go and do it again.

Take comfort in the fact that he has done it to you and will probably 'offend' again so the 'other woman' is welcome to him.

Dont bother confronting her, its more humiliating to you then her whatever the circumstances, keep calm, keep you dignity and respect and certainly take your time sorting the house out.  He can force a sale but it will take a great deal of time and will cost him a pretty penny to take it through the courts.

Good Luck

[curiosity]

I know this will be hard for you, but try to respond rather than react instantly to what he says or does, even though you feel really angry or threatened. Agree with him, if he suggests things arn't right. When he's out with her he'll be wondering what wasn't right for you then, he'll wonder how to change and will feel uncomfortable. Don't make rash decisions about your belongings (I miss my bread crock! which was later smashed apparently) Seriously, keep some photos of when you and your mates (or even him cut off) have been together on hols, weddings etc, his girlfriend will rip them up through jealously, and your kids will ask you in years to come for photos of when you were young , and you won't have any. Make sure you get the pics