Best Ever One-Liner?

[NoMercy]

My favourite...

Journo asking Joan Collins about (much younger) husband, Percy Gibson.

Journo: Does the age gap bother you?

Collins: If he dies, he dies...

What's your favourite ever one-liner?

[NoMercy]

Lady Astor: If you were my husband, I'd poison your coffee.

Churchill: If you were my wife, I'd drink it!

[36TEAK36]

My Boss called me a fat b@stard one day, so I replied that the only reason I am fat is because every time I fcuk your wife she gives me a biscuit.

[marval]

Is there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect working order. (Spike Milligan)

[NoMercy]

The Journalist who spotted her financier boyfriend by chance, after he disappeared without trace eight years earlier:

"What are you doing here? I thought I told you to wait in the car! "

[NoMercy]

Once at a social gathering, Gladstone said to Disraeli: 'I predict, Sir, that you will die either by hanging or of some vile disease'.

Disraeli replied, 'That all depends, sir, upon whether I embrace your principles or your mistress.'

[mazie]

"So Trevor, where's that eight inches you promised me last night? Oh, hell! Are we still on air?"

Becky Mantin - BBC weathergirl,

[Barmaid]

How many husbands have you had?

Zsa Zsa Gabor "What, my own?"