I've been very daft.my ex was babysitting our son at my house last night and he asked for access to my laptop while i was out to go on facebook,etc so i stupidly left it on for him. then while i was out for some reason he was looking at more personal stuff on it. rather like reading a diary he has read some of my personal thoughts i had put into words about how i feel about him now,his faults etc. i know this sounds a bit childish but i've struggled to get over the fact that he cheated one me and left me and our little family for someone almost half his age.
he also came across evidence of something that i feel really bad about -a little flirtation that i had with a guy who has a girlfriend and children. although i stopped it just as soon as it started as i felt really bad about it from the guy's girlfrriend's point of view having been in this position just a few months ago.
anyway so now my ex has got the hump big time.he sent me a number of texts while i was out saying that i was a hypocrite etc. and that he realises how crap he is and not a good role model for our son so i should enjoy my night as it will be the last one he is doing and he won't be around anymore!
he wouldn't even talk to me when i got back to the house -only to say that i'm as bad as he is and that fella's girlfriend would be really hurt.
my mate reckons he has been looking for any excuse to not be around so i shouldn't even worry about it but i do want him to be in our son's life even if it causes me stress.
any thoughts on this please. i can't stop feeling bad about this.
You've done a terrible terrible thing,you've hurt his ego :)He shouldn't have gone snooping,those who listen at doors and all that.Leave the drama queen to calm down a bit,then reassess the situation then.
yes i said something similar to him last night riss -if you go snooping u will end up seeing something you don't want to see. i just can't believe he was acting all moral about it! but i'm going to try to stop dwelling on it and maybe contact him in a few days.
Stirkes me you're as bad as each other! If you want him to be involved in your son's life, despite what you obviously think of him (and have now let him know really what you think), you may need to do a bit fo bridge building yourself, as well as letting him calm down.
In the end it is not just about you two knocking spots of each other, it is about your son and his relationship with his parents. Grow up both!
he is next here on tuesday evening ummmm so i'm thinking about contacting him during the day to see how the land lies.what do you think? i'm guessing he is upset about what i said about him (must've hurt cos he likes to think of himself as bloody perfect even after everything he's done) and a little jealous like you say.
i've been thinking the same androcles. unfortunately my ex can makes things tough for me. changing arrangements,cancelling visits and wrangling over money he owes me.i wish it was a bit easier but all the same i want him to keep seeing our son so i tolerate it... my flirtation wasn't the norm for me in any way. i think it was a distraction from what was a really really tough week for me and i soon thought better of it.
do you always go out when he is there? ,i wouldn't wait till Tuesday to build bridges ,was what you wrote about him on the desktop did it have his name on it ?
thankyou all for your answers. unfortunately our little boy ended up in hospital on sunday and i obviously contacted my ex because of this. he was very civil to me and actually came to see our little boy as soon as he could which he hasn't done in the past. :O(
when i mentioned about talking thru what happened at the weekend- he muttered something about 'these things happen' and made it plain he didn't want to talk about it.( but i'm sure it'll be brought up in the future)