I have a dilemma

[Nay35]

My boyfriend who I love very much says he doesnt want kids and I would like another child before I am too old to have them but my boyfriend says he is just not ready for that. He is 6 yrs younger than me and is studying to be a tax accountant and has a couple of years at least left which is fine but he says he doesnt want any kids ever and I will be 35 this year. I said I was happy to wait a couple more years but he says he doesn't want a child in the foreseable future.

What my dilemma is is whether I stay with him and possibly not have any more children and may end up resenting for that or we split and there would be no guarantee that I will find the right man that I love as much as my current boyfriend.

Any thoughts.

[dothawkes31]

You're asking the question and so you;re bothered by it, it's a case of who is being the most selfish, and i would probably say him as he is not being asked to do anything that would interfer with his future as milllions of people start familes and manage rewarding and successful careers, he sounds possibly frightened of commitment and effort

[sara3]

there's no right or wrong, and there's not much room for compromise. nobody knows what the future holds, or what's around the corner.

do you love him enough to not have another child? (I assume you already have children.) would you risk the prospect of being on your own?

there are no easy answers.. sorry.

[tamborine]

Your children will always be with you - bf......disposable

[Le Chat]

You asked him the question and he has answered you. You now need to believe him. Bear in mind most people regret the things they don't do (apparantly!)

[Tim123]

No one is being selfish, but it's one area where there is no possibility of compromise. You have to decide where that leaves you.

[suzie1]

pin holes in the condoms...miss a pill....take the coil out and dont tell him. dress provocatively while off the contraception and wish for the best....lol joking aside,

i want another one now and my husband doesnt want one, so i know how you feel, its hard, i cant leave him and think i will have another with someone else, coz that someone else may neva come, i got the other kiddies to think about and how it would affect them, and i love him (i think) hope it works out for the best, good luck chuck...
x

[Tim123]

Tambourine,
Bf: disposable.
Bf who fathers your child: a commitment for at least 16 years.

[cazzz1975]

I agree with sara, there is no right answer, whatever you do though do not deceive him by getting yourself pregnant without his consent. do you already have children? maybe you should feel blessed with those? I am 35 and I dont think I would contemplate more kids at my age.

he will either change his mind or you will change yours, enjoy your relationship and your children that are in your life now x

[Nay35]

Thanks Guys, beliveve me I have thought about not taking the pill and letting nature take its course, but that is deceptive and I am not a deceptive person. I love him more than life and just want HIS kids no one elses. So I will have to wait and see if he changes his mind about having a child with me.