misleading town guides

[joggerjayne]

I've been looking through one of those free "guides to the city's attractions" that you pick up from newsagents. Here are some total "LOL" descriptions ...

Description: "The Brighton Centre continues to strengthen its reputation for headlining live music ..."

Reality: The Brighton Centre's only reputation is for being the biggest blot on the entire south coast. It must have been designed by a blind architect.

Description: "Check out Brighton Marina - one of Europe's leading City lifestyle destinations."

Reality: The Marina is utterly, utterly ghastly. Do not go there, unless you have a penchant for bland food, Wetherspoons pubs, discount outlet shops ... and Asda.

Description: "For year round entertainment there's no better place than Brighton Pier."

Reality: Sorry, there is entertainment on the Pier?? Well yes, if you are "entertained" by Lithuanian fish and chip stands, overpriced crap coffee, snogging teenagers and day trippers in daft hats eating candy floss.

Description: "The Royal Pavilion has been restored to its original 1823 splendour ..."

Reality: The Pavilion seems particularly attractive to drunk holidaymakers who use the gardens for puking and/or shagging.



Do you have "attractions" that are not all they are cracked up to be?

I want to write a book called ...

"Ignore the tourist traps ... here are the GOOD bits!"

[Bbbananas]

Boston has a huge stump - beat that !

[rinkins]

he he I just looked at "places to visit" link where I live and the first attraction is The White Hart in Coggeshall lol that's miles away!

[B00]

That roughly translates to "bugger all round there to see" Rinkins :-)

I should know, I live in an area where the highlight is brass rubbings for God's sake!

[rinkins]

"Approximately 50 miles from London and with excellent links to the coast and East Anglia via A120, A12, M11 and direct rail, and with the addition of Stansted airport 16 miles away, our district is the perfect location for a short break or day trip away from hectic lifestyles"

Horlicks - it just means there are plenty of escape routes once you've realised how pants it is

Oh and we have an outlet village. Woohoo

[rinkins]

lol BOO - precisely!! ^^^^

[pastafreak]

I LOVE this site......... http://www.chavtowns.co.uk/

anybody find their towns there?

Here's mine....heeheee...2 very funny descriptions

http://www.chavtowns....england/devon/page/2/

[B00]

Haha, yeah Pasta, Rossendale is there in all it's errr shining glory!

[mazie]

We about the same BOO. This is about a 4 minute drive from where I live. Check out their daily timetable !!!

http://www.mountsaintbernard.org/index.html

[mrs_overall]

I've checked out that site before Pasta, and I'm happy to report I live in a non-chav town.
Mind you, we are over-run with tourists who ask stupid questions.
Our abbey was built in 654AD and some Germans once asked me about it and asked why it was in such a state of disrepair.
I didn't have the heart to tell them it was OK until they shelled it in 1917

[B00]

Actually Mazie, that looks rather nice!

I did get overly excited over what happens at 5.30, till i realised it was spelt vespers and not Vespas- oh well!

[rinkins]

Haven't found my town yet.....Harlow is taking a right bashing though he he

[mazie]

It is BOO and if you feel like a bit of peace it's an ideal place to visit. In my case, that's frequently! But a 3.30 start! madness

[rinkins]

Oh dear found it - I was going to cut a paste a paragraph but the swear filter would have a field day!

[redcrx]

all i can find for where i live is

"Fire destroyed most of the older buildings in 1665, although Anne of Cleves' House, which once formed part of the dower of the Queen's Consort of England has been completely renovated.

The town is of interest for its Victorian architecture, local history collection and Town Hall, which has recently been refurbished and is now an arts centre"

thats it! No mention of the chemical factories at all lol

[pastafreak]

Here's our official site....which is at least 2 weeks out of date-going by the 'favourfest' news to the right.......

http://www.plymouth.g...living/citycentre.htm

Towns and cities are never as 'exciting' as the guidebooks seem to think

[rinkins]

Maybe the people that write the books have never been

[cc1]

The last place I would put the good places is in a guide, who wants all the rest of the riff raff? Like good restaurants etc, they remain closely gurded secrets!

[redcrx]

"GURDED"? is that a Norfolk expression, cc1? lol