help help

[Connemmara]

My sister has visited here as she does once a week. Again I feel I went through hell with all her deorgatory nastiness which she covers quite easily. I am getting unwell with this - you know the loss of my car - she does not believe it was stolen so early in the nigt.Then she started about the neighbours of my street (WHO ARE BRILLIANT) thy are this and that. When she leave I nearly become suicidal because I dont do anything right.

I am up set that I cannot even tye correctly. |I love her but yesterday she put years on me. I think she takes the death of her son out on me. |Nobod y can see this but I do need to speak to soebody abot this sob sobbing

[Connemmara]

also when i confide one friend they all say face up to her and say this and that to her but i cant - I wil go to the clergy for counselling \i think

[anneasquith]

dont let her in your house ?

[Bbbananas]

Make sure you're out when she comes round.
And if you are in - hide under the table.

[Connemmara]

no she has been coming for 40 years and has to cross town by taxi so I would rather to tell her phone not to come and let on I am away.

[Dris]

I think you have to seek help from you Church.It would seem that you are her 'whipping' girl and she see's you as an easy target for her spite.

[ttfn]

Do you think your sister realises the devastation she causes you Conne?

[Connemmara]

dris i think you are right - god i am so low but also though I say it myself I am a very kind thughtful peron. sorry for the spellig

[CatGirl4]

Do you have one of those personal radio thingys? When she arrives,have the ear plugs in your ears,when she is fed up with repeating things,she'll ask what's wrong,then say you're fed up with her always moaning about every body/thing.Or,the next couple of times she comes,say you can't stay in,you have an appointment.Maybe she will take the hint! If it were me,i just wouldn't open the door.Good luck.x

[Connemmara]

i wish it was as easy as all that - she is my only sister and we have 3 other brothers and we are not close she is all I have

[ttfn]

Has this been a recent change in your relationship with your sister, have things worsened since the loss of your nephew? Are you able to put your views forward on general matters during her weekly visit with you or does your sister tend to monopolise the conversation?

[joko]

she is probably deeply bitter an angry at the world and cant see any good in anyone or anything...because of the loss of her son...it may eb subconscious...but maybe shes actually just fearful of anything bad happening to you..so when it does , she lashes out and wants someone to blame...ie, blaming the neighbours for your car...
she may feel able to do this in your presense as you dont complain and you are her sister so she feels more comfortable opening up her true feelings in front of you...

[Connemmara]

she can be a funny and witty person as well but the son is dead 5 and half years but wont even mention his name so it is like the missing person in the middle and we talk around it and it stresses me out terribly. I have loads of friends but I would not tell them what I am going through week after week because they would stick up for me and I dont like confrontation and falls-outs.

[ttfn]

But perhaps if you told your best confidante you would feel better for doing so. Otherwise you are going to do a wonderful impression of a pressure cooker on full steam Conne. I really think you should talk to someone and soon. Does your sister ever meet your close friends?

[petal54]

I see now how lucky I am with my sister!best wishes

[Connemmara]

sister knows every one of them

[ttfn]

and how do they get on with your sister? Have they ever socialised or more like passing ships?